etiquette question??

[Tiggerlovr9000]

My daughter has her confirmation on Sunday and I have invited 20 guests to meet us at a restaurant afterwards for lunch.. If you got such an invite would you expect the person doing the asking to pay for your lunch?? My gut feeling tells me yes.

[Christine]

If your invitation stated the confirmation AND the restaurant, I would say yes. If your invitation only included the confirmation and then you just mentioned, "afterwards we're having lunch at so-and-so's if you want to come along", I would say no.

[offwego]

If you invitation stated the confirmation AND the restaurant, I would say yes. If your invited only included the confirmation and then you just mentioned, "afterwards we're having lunch at so-and-so's if you want to come along", I would say no.

I agree with Christine..if the restaurant was mentioned in the invitation I would think the person was paying for the meal.

[Strmchsr]

If you invitation stated the confirmation AND the restaurant, I would say yes. If your invited only included the confirmation and then you just mentioned, "afterwards we're having lunch at so-and-so's if you want to come along", I would say no.

Unless you specifically stated that lunch was "dutch" then I would expect this to be paid for.

[Catwillow]

I don't think it would be appropriate to 'assume' that you are going to get the lunch paid for .... not unless the invitation specifically stated that the price of lunch would be included.

When you are invited to a "meet" with any group / club / friends / get together would you go with the expectation of someone else paying for it?? I don't.

That's just my personal opinion.

Kathleen

[crazypoohbear]

I would assume that lunch was being picked up by the host. Confirmations are a gift giving occassion and I would think that the luncheon was prearranged. If this is not the case I would try to find a way to make sure this is known ahead of time.
For my son's confirmation last year we had about 30 people back to our house for a luncheon. And tomorrow we are going to a friends house for a luncheon after her son's confirmation. I know another friend who is just having her immediate family out to lunch. It might be a regional thing also. Different parts of the country do things differently.

[PAYROLL PRINCESS]

I would think it was being paid for just as if you were invited to a wedding with the reception following or bridal shower with the luncheon out somewhere.

[Tiggerlovr9000]

Thanks for everyone's reply. We will be picking up the tab. I had planned on it anyway, just hate the awkward moments when the check comes. I am going to ask the waitress to keep it until I ask for it..