Being at Disney with a family member you don't care for

[AirlineGuy07]

Have you ever been to Disney with a family member you don't care for. I thought a few months ago we were going with just the four of us as a family. Well things have changed and now my sister in law, brother in law and father in law are going to be there the same time in two weeks. My sister and father in law are fine but its my brother in law who my DW and I can't stand. He is very selfish and its his way or no one else's way. My DW wants to be with her sister so I'm going to try to keep my mouth shut and live with it for a few days. Thankfully they are staying at OKW and we are staying at BCV. Plus all but one meal ressies will be at different places. Also I only have to deal with it four out of the nine days we are there. Anyone have any tips or have been in my shoes. I hate being stressed on my vacation! Thanks!

[princessgirls]

I feel your pain...REALLY feel your pain...

In most cases things will go better than you hope, and Disney being the HUGE place it is, hopefully you won't have too much together time.

I have struggled with this for 20 years with my DH's family.

I just smile and wave... what else can I do? I love my husband and kids, and do it for them.
My inlaws live pretty far, and since my MIL has passed away, our visits with them are not often.
Good Luck!
Julie:mickey:

[jodijo]

Been there, done that! I am so sorry you have to go through it.

With that being said, I am sure it will be ok. Like someone else said, WDW is a big place. When I went, I just made sure to go and see other things and ride on the rides my relatives would not want to do. I also asked them what there plans were and then said I had planed to do other things. It worked well. They did what they wanted, I did what I wanted, and we met up at some point during the day.

I hope you have a great vacation! :mickey:

[Scar]

Don't stress, you'll be fine. Assuming your BIL is old enough to be on his own, when he wants to do something you don't, just smile and say "OK, we're going to do ______, we'll meet you (someplace) at ___o'clock.

ETA: Rats, I hate being beaten to a post with the same idea. ;)

[CzepielCrew]

Horrible! I would never do it again. I will never ever take my mother in law again. Too much to even explain.

[mook3y]

I have a step-sister that is very much the same way whenever many of us get together for any type of vacation/amusement park/zoo, etc.

Basically, I have learned that when she starts getting to be "too much" for me, we tend to wander off and do our own thing for a while. Allowing her to have "her way" all the time... just by herself and those that choose to go along.

Other siblings have noticed this and started doing the same thing I do. ;)

Dont know if this will work with you, but it is worth a shot!

[Jennifer_and_Chris]

Since you are staying at separate resorts, that helps a ton!

You're doing the best thing by already having only those "scheduled" family times. Unfortunatly, for your own family's sake, being selfish is really what you have to do. Make sure you and your family have the time of your lives FIRST. Having those schedule ressies together (or whatever it is) gives you the chance to mentally prepare for it and doesn't take away from any part of your happiness like all-day-every-day would. Being prepared and having understood expectations is the best line of defense.

[deedeebee]

It looks like many of us have done this! We went last year, NEVER AGAIN:thedolls: You have the resort as an oasis, that's a really good thing. We were two doors apart at the Poly. We really tried to focus on all the great things that Disney offers, so much to look at and enjoy, even in lines. Try not to worry too much and remember not to let them take the joy out of your trip. This happened to me:( When we returned I did not want to go back, ever. I have recovered, we are returning in Nov:mickey:

[ThanxForNoticin]

It sounds like you already have most of the important pieces in place - separate resort, mostly separate meals, and it's only for a few days. There will so much time where you don't need to worry about interacting that you should be fine when you do. We have had something similar, and we just refused to get all bent out of shape over it. You stay relaxed, tolerate it for a few days, and enjoy yourself at one of the most fun places on Earth! Hope you enjoy your trip! Good luck!

[MMFreak]

It will be so much easier than you think. I go every year with my estranged husband. I know seems weird to say but we really can't stand each other and we take the kids on vacation every year(I am finally relieved of this this year and will be taking the kids on seperate vacations ***I GET DISNEY Woohoo***) and even stay in the same room and eat at the same time. Sometimes we split up and one child goes off with him for a bit but in general we are together the whole time and we always have a great time. Somehow when in Disney alot of issues are overlooked because of the very atmosphere you are in.

[MOJoe]

Thankfully i've never dealt with this issue, but i still have a suggestion. Agree to disagree. At WDW, when someone insists that it's "my way or else", take the else. It works very well for parties to split up and enjoy the things that each one wants to do. There are so many things to see and do, that trying to keep a big group together and make everyone happy is difficult, even when they all get along. So when your BIL insists on everyone getting in line for the Jungle Cruise, just excuse yourself and yours, and head over to Pirates. :thumbsup:

[sydzach]

I have done this before, actually with both sides of the family-my wife's and my own. With my wife's family, this will be our second time with them and her sis and our BIL, they like to be in control and think they know it all. But, I go along at times and other times just do my own thing. They are staying at camp wilderness and we have yet to book our hotel, but only will have the MIL staying with us at the hotel-still trying to decide if we get to rooms or a suite-I lean strongly for two rooms but we are on a tight budget. With my side, my bro and his family, they just simply don't like the parks like my wife and our kids do and my parents same thing-and they are getting older and don't like crowds either. Course when we went with them we were the experts so they followed us around. They were just ready to leave before we were ready. I guess the bottom line, just try to make the best of the situation, if you get frustrated, say you want to do something else and head that direction and agree to meet at a certain time. You have to shrug it off and just decide you are going to make the best of it regardless of the situation.

[jlmct52]

In 1990, we had a family trip to WDW. (Me, my Mom & Dad, my brother and sister-in-law, my niece, my 2 nephews and my aunt, uncle and cousin.

Without a doubt, my aunt made the trip miserable for everyone. My uncle was confined to a wheelchair and wanted to do everything. My aunt, on the other hand, always had excuses why he couldn't do certain things....even though there was no reason he couldn't. So, after about 3 days, my brother and I had had enough. Despite her protests, we took our uncle on absolutely everything we went on and he had the time of his life.

Unfortunately, our aunt just wouldn't let it go and complained about absolutely everything and let us know repeatedly how much she hated WDW and how much better Dollywood is! LOL

My prayers are with you, but I think you will make out fine.

[Loweschevy]

Yes, I agree with many of the other posters with keeping your own schedule. You do not need to spend every minute together, especially if you will not enjoy it. I would lay down the law right away-meaning to tell them you have a touring plan and thats what you will be following. Remember it is your vacation too and if there are things you want to do with just your family make it very clear.

My feeling is that it always sounds like a lot of fun going with extended family or friends in theory, but it can turn into a disaster if you are not organized. After all, who wants to spend an hour fighting over which park to go to first.

Keep your plan and stick to it and I hope you have a great time!