SunnyLee
12-19-2007, 01:05 AM
I don't know if you have ever had one..but I have ..and it was today.
...Many of you know that I am training for a Marathon at Disney that is January 13th..which means..it's coming up. So today after school I thought I would go for a four hour run (yes I said 4 and hours together..). There is a place by my apartment called Flatwoods Park that has a paved road w/ water stops almost every two miles, and with marked miles totaling at 11 miles. And for those reasons I like it best to run there...however not today. I started my run out at 3:30pm and was in the 'flow' or rythmn of my running when at about mile 12 I realized what time it was and how dark it had suddenly become. ..the park closes at 6pm ..and for good reason. Back in Flatwoods is complete...darkness; the feel of going camping but all by yourself with all sorts of different animals. On previous runs I have seen; bucks, does, wild hogs, peacocks, snakes, armadillos, great big spiders and who knows whatelse is back there. I looked at my trusty watch and saw it was 10 till 6pm...and I was a long way from the beginning (as I had taken some back trails and winded all sorts of different ways)...and then...something very awful happened. I began to panic...I don't panic or get scared very easily I try to take things in stride and take what comes..but this ..this was something different. It was just me and the woods..and the quickly approaching darkness.
..I ran for awhile....at a very quick pace...but I had lost all my flow..and because of the fear, cold sweat, cold air and this new panic my ligaments were beginning to ache something awful. As I ran, I literally screamed for help...but it was only heard by the trees...and me, as it echoed through the woods.
...my quick pace and my tensing up only made my knees ache more so I had to stop..I started walking, just as the sun was now completely gone from the sky. ..Now tease me if you want about this next part..but honestly what would you have done? As I was walking I started to get choked up, holding back tears that wanted to run free, thinking "this could be it.." or "no know will find me until the morning...and it'll be too late". So with these thoughts I would start running again..I will NOT let this beat me..I will not stop. However..panic and fear can be stronger than your will or spirit..and so we definitely had a battle going on out there in the 'wilderness'..I wonder if this is how Christ felt in Matthew 4. I then began to cry out to God "Help Me! Please send something, someone..anyone! Help me!!" As I continued my walk...struggle to run...God sent help..He sent the Moon to guide me as it as now pitch black outside...but more importantly He sent the Spirit (and I TOTALLY believe this...) to keep me strong and confident to finish and make it to the front of the park.
....As I was running I became almost two people at one time: one person who was struggling to move her legs with each step, while her back was screaming in pain and knees threatening to break apart..the second was her coach "come on Hawkins you can make it..you WILL make it..just a little further..remember you can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens you!"
...I stumbled into my apartment at 7:15ishpm...nausea, in complete pain, dehydrated, hungry but repulsed by thought of food, weak, ....and very very cold. I am okay now...thankfully w/ a hot bath, a nap and some stern talking to by those I love I am doing better...and have even eaten some toast.
...but trust me..I will never do that again...
...Many of you know that I am training for a Marathon at Disney that is January 13th..which means..it's coming up. So today after school I thought I would go for a four hour run (yes I said 4 and hours together..). There is a place by my apartment called Flatwoods Park that has a paved road w/ water stops almost every two miles, and with marked miles totaling at 11 miles. And for those reasons I like it best to run there...however not today. I started my run out at 3:30pm and was in the 'flow' or rythmn of my running when at about mile 12 I realized what time it was and how dark it had suddenly become. ..the park closes at 6pm ..and for good reason. Back in Flatwoods is complete...darkness; the feel of going camping but all by yourself with all sorts of different animals. On previous runs I have seen; bucks, does, wild hogs, peacocks, snakes, armadillos, great big spiders and who knows whatelse is back there. I looked at my trusty watch and saw it was 10 till 6pm...and I was a long way from the beginning (as I had taken some back trails and winded all sorts of different ways)...and then...something very awful happened. I began to panic...I don't panic or get scared very easily I try to take things in stride and take what comes..but this ..this was something different. It was just me and the woods..and the quickly approaching darkness.
..I ran for awhile....at a very quick pace...but I had lost all my flow..and because of the fear, cold sweat, cold air and this new panic my ligaments were beginning to ache something awful. As I ran, I literally screamed for help...but it was only heard by the trees...and me, as it echoed through the woods.
...my quick pace and my tensing up only made my knees ache more so I had to stop..I started walking, just as the sun was now completely gone from the sky. ..Now tease me if you want about this next part..but honestly what would you have done? As I was walking I started to get choked up, holding back tears that wanted to run free, thinking "this could be it.." or "no know will find me until the morning...and it'll be too late". So with these thoughts I would start running again..I will NOT let this beat me..I will not stop. However..panic and fear can be stronger than your will or spirit..and so we definitely had a battle going on out there in the 'wilderness'..I wonder if this is how Christ felt in Matthew 4. I then began to cry out to God "Help Me! Please send something, someone..anyone! Help me!!" As I continued my walk...struggle to run...God sent help..He sent the Moon to guide me as it as now pitch black outside...but more importantly He sent the Spirit (and I TOTALLY believe this...) to keep me strong and confident to finish and make it to the front of the park.
....As I was running I became almost two people at one time: one person who was struggling to move her legs with each step, while her back was screaming in pain and knees threatening to break apart..the second was her coach "come on Hawkins you can make it..you WILL make it..just a little further..remember you can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens you!"
...I stumbled into my apartment at 7:15ishpm...nausea, in complete pain, dehydrated, hungry but repulsed by thought of food, weak, ....and very very cold. I am okay now...thankfully w/ a hot bath, a nap and some stern talking to by those I love I am doing better...and have even eaten some toast.
...but trust me..I will never do that again...