Pixie dust and prayers for our trip next week. Sorry kinda long, need to vent

[Hayden's Dad]

**UPDATE**
Well guys after many weeks here of he said she said, I'll get back to you and so forth and so on I finally got an answer from the big boss on whether I would be paid fo this or not. And the answer is that I have to take it as unpaid time. That's okay I am just glad I still have a job. Thank you all so much for all of your thoughts, prayers, pixie dust, kind words, and threats for my work they have all been very much appreciated. At least now I can keep all my time for this year so we can have more adventures with Hayden.

I am usually a very patient and understanding man. I have a long fuse that can burn for a long time, but I am coming to the end of my rope.
As most of you probably know my son Hayden was diagnosed earlier this year with a terminal neurological disease. The disease is usually terminal by the age of two. He is now 22 months old. Before he was born My wife and I started planning our first family trip to WDW since it is such a magical place for us. That trip is taking place next week. Once Hayden was diagnosed in Febuary of this year my family came together and with the help of generous donations from them and other friends, family, and complete strangers they were able to pay our way for all of us brothers and our families to go in May and it was a wonderful magical trip, but we still had our small family trip planned.

When Hayden was originally diagnosed I spoke to my manager at work, she said that our Regional manager said that any time I neede for Hayden would be fine, great. Now I didn't abuse it by no means, but there were a few things we wanted to do with Hayden in the time we had. Then my manager left the company and a new one has not been established yet so I spoke to my Regional to make sure everything was ok, he had no idea what I was talking about my mnager had never talked to him. We then discusse that if I needed additional time that I could take it off of next year or whatever, but it would be worked out. Well now he is gone and I have no manager, no regional manger and the person I am currently reporting to who originally knew what was going on is now telling me she doesn't remember any of it and she is not sure what we can do.

I found this out this morning, we leave for Disney on SUNDAY!! I told her that I would take it unpaid if need be but I couldn't change my plans now. She said she would make some phone calls and see what she could do and call me back later today.
On top of that we have been getting nothing but negative responses from our families (except for on eof my brother's he is very much for us going) Either they are worried about Hayden's health (which his nurse says he will be fine, an dif there is a problem we will be under Hospice care down there also) or about my job and that should be my top priority.

I refuse to sit around and wait for the inevitable staring at the same four walls day in and day out!! It is not fair to my wife who stays home with Hayden all day everyday, and it is not fair to Hayden!! We have to have small goals in place to give us something to look forward to! After Disney it will be Christmas after that it will be his birthday on the 10th of January.

Thank you for listening I needed to vent and have released some of my stress. Thank you for all the pixie dust and prayers you all have sent so far they have made an extrodinary difference in our lives.

[bleukarma]

I am so sorry you have to go through this extra stress with everything else going on. Worrying about your job is a major stress factor and to have that on top of a sick child has to be awful. I’m sending some pixie dust in hopes that everything works out and that you and your family have a magical trip next week! :pixie::pixie:

[KylesMom]

You know what's most important in life - don't let anyone discourage you from taking this magical trip, Hayden's Dad. Know that our thoughts, prayers and pixie dust wishes are with you. Sending positive thoughts your way so that everything works itself out and that your departure day is trouble-free! :mickey:

[ILoveLegos]

:pixie::pixie::pixie: Go to Disney, enjoy the precious time with your son Hayden, do what's best for you and you family, ignore the naysayers. Best Wishes.

[ll MaJiK ll]

Do what feels right. You know what's best and I hope you have a splendid trip. Pixie dust and prayers coming to you.

[SurferStitch]

Your precious time with Hayden is what matters most now. Leave the stress behind, and you and your wife have a magical time in a magical place with him. Time spent together as a family is the most important thing.

Unless your supervisor (or whatever she is) is a horribly demonic person, the job will still be there when you get back. That should probably be the least of your worries.

The family will still be there when you get back, and they'll get over your trip with Hayden. He's your son, and you know what's best for the three of you. Again, no worries.

Go, have a magical time together, and make memories that will last forever. That's what matters.

[Tink&Goofy]

I think your priorities are COMPLETELY in the right place!! Spend that magical time with your child! Those are the memories that you will hold dear - Not the fact that you had bosses that didn't understand!

I hope you have a magical trip!

[RedheadWriter]

:pixie: to you and your family.
You have your priorities in the right place.
Rachel

[biodtl]

I'm sorry you are having a hard time right now. I hope you have a wonderful trip. Regardless of what anyone tries to tell you, you'll never regret spending this time at WDW with your son.

Hopefully your family will come around and see that you are doing the right thing. I'm sure they mean well, but are speaking through their own stress and fear right now.

[faline]

:pixie::pixie::pixie: I'm sorry you've run into this glitch. I hope this is all resolved and you are able to leave your work stresses behind for a wonderful time with your family!

[IloveDisney71]

I hate to hear that you are experiencing these problems. It is so sad that so many people place work over family! Go and enjoy your time with your little one and don't worry about what other people think.
Hospice is a wonderful organization and will be able to help you with any needs you have.
Here's some pixie dust:pixie: and best wishes for a magical and memorable time!

[meldan98]

I'm so sorry you are going through this. This is the last thing you and your family need to deal with at this point. :pixie: You and your family will be in my prayers.

Hopefully, your employer will grow a heart and will accomodate you.

Now, with my HR Hat on, does your company qualify for FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act), if not does your state have something to fill in the gap? You should be eligible for that kind of leave.

[thrillme]

I've been thinking about ya'll quite a bit. My prayers are with you.

Enjoy your trip. Enjoy your time with Hayden. Things have a way of working out.

I totally agree with you...you'll make yourself and your dear wife crazy just sitting waiting for the inevitable rather than actually LIVING.

[Jeff]

Terrible that you have this unexpected problem with work. I hope they work it out for you.

Go and make some great memories!:thumbsup:
God bless you, your wife and your precious son.

[pdrlkr]

:pixie::pixie::pixie:

[LandFan]

Wow! I can't believe that she is giving you a hard time about this trip! I am guessing she doesn't have children of her own!

Do what you need to do. No one else is in your shoes (not even your family) and can remotely understand you and your wife's need for a little escape and fun while you can.

I hope this all gets straightened out and we still see you down there next week with smiles on your faces:D

Life is short - even shorter for some - take the time you have and run with it - make sure you will have no regrets.

See you soon!

Tara & Jason

[mttafire]

You know what's most important in life - don't let anyone discourage you from taking this magical trip, Hayden's Dad. Know that our thoughts, prayers and pixie dust wishes are with you. Sending positive thoughts your way so that everything works itself out and that your departure day is trouble-free! :mickey:
:ditto:
I hope your trip is the most magical ever. I hope you all, especially your son has a wonderful time!
God Bless, Shawn

[Jasper]

My heart certainly goes out to you, your wife, and to little Hayden.

If you and your wife feel like this is the right thing to do then it IS the right thing to do. Don't let others influence your decisions where your child is concerned. The only opinions other than those of you and your wife's that should matter are those of your child's doctors. And since you say they are OK with going then I say do it.

As for your job, I have spent the better part of the last 15 years working in Human Resources and I can tell you that rules can and should be broken at times and this certainly sounds like one of those times. There are two other things you should think about when it comes to your job.

First is that if your company won't work with you at a time like this then is it really where you want to be working?

Second, many people that lose a small child report that after such a loss that it helps them clear their heads about it by completely changing everything in their life including their job. So maybe if you do lose your job on the other end of things it may actually be good for you.

When it is all said and done you have only yourself and your wife to consider so do what you think is right and let life take you where it will!

Good luck and best wishes!!

[Jenemmy]

You know what -- this is the time to make it all about you and your precious family. Don't be discouraged by a soul. None of those people are walking in your shoes or know what you and your wife need. Doesn't matter if they get it or not! Hayden is the priority -- other things will fall where they fall.

I can't even imagine a company that wouldn't bend on this and see your position. I am so sorry you have had even the slightest of things deflate your trip excitement. You certainly don't deserve it.

As I said in another post, I pray for you all often and I pray SPECIFICALLY for your upcoming trip. May it be all you've dreamed.

[merlinmagic4]

:pixie: :pixie: :pixie: Nothing should come between your family and this trip. I sure hope they don't give you any problems. I think we'll all be on edge until Sunday arrives; please let us know.

[conorsmom2000]

My heart certainly goes out to you, your wife, and to little Hayden.

If you and your wife feel like this is the right thing to do then it IS the right thing to do. Don't let others influence your decisions where your child is concerned. The only opinions other than those of you and your wife's that should matter are those of your child's doctors. And since you say they are OK with going then I say do it.

As for your job, I have spent the better part of the last 15 years working in Human Resources and I can tell you that rules can and should be broken at times and this certainly sounds like one of those times. There are two other things you should think about when it comes to your job.

First is that if your company won't work with you at a time like this then is it really where you want to be working?


Very well said!

My heart just broke reading this - I'm so sorry that you are dealing with this stress when you should be getting ready for your magical trip. Just follow your heart. As we all know, sadly, life is just way too short for all of us - and these magical moments with your son are just too important to pass up.

Your family will be in my thoughts and prayers - please know that your I'COT family is always here to listen!! :pixie::pixie:

[LibertyTreeGal]

Honey, I am going to be praying for you overtime and then some. I know that things are frustrating and downright stressful and scary, but Hayden is #1, 2, 3 and 4 priority in your life right now and even if that means getting fired you will NOT regret it, not this year, not in ten years - not even if he lives 50 more years.

This will work out, regardless of the outcome. And your family members, they are scared and frustrated too, but they aren't there everyday, it's just different. They are reacting to worldly "needs" and making silly requests of you.

As for me, I plan on hugging you guys on November 29th, and you'd better be there!

[Strmchsr]

Kyle, you'll definitely be in my prayers, and here's lots of :pixie: for you guys. I hope it all works out! I'm looking forward to meeting you next week!

[gauvin4]

I'm sorry you are having a hard time right now. I hope you have a wonderful trip. Regardless of what anyone tries to tell you, you'll never regret spending this time at WDW with your son.

Hopefully your family will come around and see that you are doing the right thing. I'm sure they mean well, but are speaking through their own stress and fear right now.

:ditto: Well said! Do what feels right for your family. Don't let anyone influence a decision that you may regret later.

:pixie::pixie: For you and your family!

God Bless

[WishingStar2006]

My heart goes out to you and your family.

The smiles, laughter and delight that Hayden will have on this magical trip will be memories that will carry you through the tough times that may lay ahead.

Have a magical trip, enjoy every precious moment. My prayers are with you and, of course, some pixie dust :pixie:

[ibelieveindisneymagic]

I am so sorry you're having this extra stress, it is the last thing you need right now! It never ceases to amaze me how some people can't see what is truly important in life...and family is always that, even more for you and your son right now.

I'll be sending prayers and pixie dust your way, and I'm sure that you'll have the wonderful vacation you've been looking forward to!

[Dsnygirl]

I am so sorry to hear you have to go through this right now - as if the holidays and everything else aren't stressful enough!! I'm sending some :pixie::pixie: that your company will get their collective heads together and do what is right for your family!!

And as far as the rest of your family goes, I believe that you are doing what is right for yours -- you definitely have your priorities in the right place, and if you and your wife feel this is what your family needs to help create some wonderful memories and get through this difficult time, no one else has the right to create questions and stress for you about it! Just ignore it and go enjoy yourselves - no one can judge others until they have walked in their shoes, and even then, no one can say what's right for anyone else. I have to believe a lot of folks out there would make the same decisions you and your wife have made -- they all make sense to me!

Good luck to you and your wife and your darling boy -- I sure hope this all works out for you!

[Hayden's Dad]

First of all thank you all so much for all of your kind words, thoughts, prayers and pixie dust. We decided last night that come what may we will be going next week. I haven't heard the final word from work yet, but I really don't care :blush:
We are looking forward to seeing as many of you as possible next week. We will be the ones on :cloud9:

[GoinGoofyPlanninThisTrip]

We decided last night that come what may we will be going next week. I haven't heard the final word from work yet, but I really don't care :blush:Good for you! Enjoy your family and have a great trip! :thumbsup:

[MsMin]

I'm so sorry you are going through this especially now with the vacation, holidays approaching etc.
Just remember to set and keep your priorities. My priorities are God, family then job.
I know it's upsetting but just try to focus on what's important to you. Does this woman have children? So often I find ppl like this just have no idea of what you are going through:( and hopefully someone above her will set her straight.
I agree that no job is worth this but I also understand how stressful it is to lose a job right now.
Sending tons of :pixie: and prayers and hoping that you can leave on Sunday with all of the stress behind you and have a wonderful time. :pixie:

[ElenitaB]

The additional stress is not what any of you need right now. I will be praying that the stressors of the outside world fade away the minute you pass under the main gates! :pixie:


Now, with my HR Hat on, does your company qualify for FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act), if not does your state have something to fill in the gap? You should be eligible for that kind of leave.
You should most definitely be involving your HR department in all of this. They will be able to support you, hopefully in ways you didn't even expect.

Here's some more :pixie: that your employer comes through for you.

[Disneyatic]

I will be keeping your entire family in my prayers.

I can't even begin to imagine the stress and worry that you and your wife and enduring and what better place than Disney World to help relieve some of that!
I agree with everyone else that family is #1 and you are making the right decision by continuing with your trip.

I also agree that if your company is treating your situation this way, is it really somewhere that you want to stay? Changing jobs is not easy, but sometimes, the best decisions are born out of necessity. Maybe this issue with your job has some other type of purpose in the master plan.

Best wishes for a magical trip filled with a lifetime of memories for all of you!

[murphy1]

Are you kidding me??? What is wrong with people!! You need positive reinforcement and you know you have it here. I think you and your wife are giving your son a wonderful life, my heart breaks over your situation. If i could go sit in your cubicle, I would do it for you.

[meldan98]

Me too! I sit in your cube for you as well!

Keep us posted!

[dolphinmickey9170]

Lots of :pixie::pixie::pixie:for your family!! You are in my thoughts and prayers. Work will still be there when you return. Have a great time and enjoy every precious minute you can with Hayden!!

[BMan62]

Good for you! Enjoy your family and have a great trip! :thumbsup:

:ditto::ditto:

[tinksmom02]

I'm so sorry you're running into problems with your trip. I've been following your posts and know how much this trip means to your family. Your priorities are absolutely in the right place. You and your wife know better than anyone what Hayden is capable of, and what his limits are. And, again, as his parents you will do your best to make sure that he gets immediate medical attention should he require it.

As for your job troubles, I can't offer any advice, but if I were in your shoes, I would throw out a couple of expletives and head off on my trip. You've done everything possible to prepare your management for this trip. Don't lose sight of what's most important.

PLEASE, please enjoy your vacation, take lots of pictures and make lots of memories! Everything at home will fall back into place (job, family) eventually...this is your once in a lifetime trip, don't let anything spoil it!

:mickey:

[Tink#64]

Kudos to you for putting your son and your family time in their rightful place-FIRST! I think you have made a positive and wonderful decision!

If the job isn't going to stand behind you in this great time of need, then something better is out there for you!

I hope you have a perfectly magical trip and make lots of wonderful memories with your son!

Pixe dust and prayers for you!:pixie:

[Nate's Grandpa]

I believe you have made the correct decision to go to Disney with your precious son.

As a bonus, you're getting a hug from TeeDee!
Hugs are always good.

[AbeeNormal]

Please excuse me for not being quite as lite as everyone else about this, but I am so angry I could just take my shoe off and throw up in it!!!

SHE DOESN'T REMEMBER...... SHE DOESN'T REMEMBER...... How can she even say that to you. I've never had the pleasure of meeting you and your beautiful family but I can tell you right now I WILL NEVER FORGET about Hayden and Hayden's Dad & Mom NEVER.

You go to WDW and I too will stay at your cubicle while your gone, just tell me where to report.

Have a wonderful time and you're doing the right thing you always have. :mickey:

[mrsgaribaldi]

It's all been said and you know what to do. Prayers and :pixie::pixie::pixie::pixie:on the way.

[DawsonAR]

I can tell you I'm a senior manager at at company and I would never put a family in your position. Your family is the most important thing in your life and a job is just a job. Yes we all must have jobs, but family is first. I tell my employees that I expect them to put their families first. Happy, relaxed employees are better producers.

I will pray that things work out for you and your family. I have a special needs child and I truely understand the pressure of trying to manage the battle of work life and home life. The stress is undescribleable.

I'm sorry that your management isn't understanding your issue.

God Bless you!

[Hayden's Dad]

Hey guys,

First of all you have all been so wonderful wtih all of your prayers, pixie dust, and well wishes thank you so much.

I just got word that I "have been approved to take the week off without pay." Nice of them to let me know two days before we leave. Sorry I am just aggravated as many of you are too, but hey at least I will have a job when we get back. :D
I am planning to look for another job internally for the same company so I can change upper management. I would like to change jobs all together, but as some of you can relate I can't risk the time lapse in insurance or them possibly considering Hayden's condition a "pre-existing" Plus as morbibd as it sounds we have a life insurance policy on Hayden through my job that was taken out before he was diagnosed and we can't afford to loose that either.

But on to happier things!! :minnie2::peter::goofy2::smickey::mjump::stitch::k ermit::figment:
We are leaving in 1 day 14 hours for Hayden's Magical Character Menagerie, and you can probably expect a long trip report when we get back. Once again Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.

[Hayden's Dad]

Hey guys,

First of all you have all been so wonderful wtih all of your prayers, pixie dust, and well wishes thank you so much.

I just got word that I "have been approved to take the week off without pay." Nice of them to let me know two days before we leave. Sorry I am just aggravated as many of you are too, but hey at least I will have a job when we get back. :D
I am planning to look for another job internally for the same company so I can change upper management. I would like to change jobs all together, but as some of you can relate I can't risk the time lapse in insurance or them possibly considering Hayden's condition a "pre-existing" Plus as morbibd as it sounds we have a life insurance policy on Hayden through my job that was taken out before he was diagnosed and we can't afford to loose that either.

But on to happier things!! :minnie2::peter::goofy2::smickey::mjump::stitch:fi gment:
We are leaving in 1 day 14 hours for Hayden's Magical Character Menagerie, and you can probably expect a long trip report when we get back. Once again Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.

[Here we go again...]

Have a wonderful trip!! :tigger::goofy::mickey3::minnie:

[tinksmom02]

I'm glad that you were able to get some wkind of resolution beofre you left, so you don't have to worry about it during your magical vacation. Have a wonderful trip and we expect a lengthy trip report when you return! :mickey:

[meldan98]

I'm so glad that they finally developed a conscience. Jiminy Cricket would be proud. I hope that you and your family have a wonderful time. I can't wait to read your trip report.

[Strmchsr]

Great news, Kyle! I can't wait to meet you and Hayden next week. :thumbsup:

[vamaggie]

So glad things worked out (somewhat--pay would have been nice!!) and that you are set to have a wonderful trip. Our prayers and best wishes go with you and your family. Please post when you return!!!:pixie: :pixie: :pixie:

[Beast_fanatic]

Sorry that I'm late with the :pixie:, but I'm glad that things have worked out to some degree (although not quite what you thought in the beginning).

[LibertyTreeGal]

Just wanted to let everyone know that Hayden, Kyle and Eva made is safely to the World and Stormchaser, CaptainJessicaSparrow and I caught up with them right before MVMCP on the 29th.

However, Kyle has not been completely forthcoming with us, he completely withheld from us how positively adorable Hayden is. Gosh, he's like this precious little cherub!!!

And I got to kiss his face and toes!!!!! :D best part of my whole trip!

It was awesome meeting with them, and I hope they survived the rain that night!

[Hayden's Dad]

Thanks Tee Dee. Yes we made it and we had a wonderful time everything was just perfect and as Libertytree Gal said we got to meet her and her family, CaptainJessicaSparow, and Strmchsr on Tuesday and then we got to ride JIYI with Landfan and her husband on Thursday. It was a pleasure meeting all of you and we are looking forward to doing it again. :thumbsup:

[like2workout]

i'm very glad it all worked out and ya'll had such a great time - plus met so many characters! that's quite a collection from 1 trip!!!

[CaptainJessicaSparrow]

However, Kyle has not been completely forthcoming with us, he completely withheld from us how positively adorable Hayden is. Gosh, he's like this precious little cherub!!!


Oh boy, you ain't lying! He really was just unbelievably adorable, sleeping so peacefully with all his princess kiss marks! (Psst - I stole a quick kiss too! But don't tell!)

I had a great time meeting all of you as well, especially Hayden's and his parents, who are without a doubt two of the most strongest, loving, and admirable people I've ever met.

I'm glad those...jerks...came to their senses and allowed you to come. You'll remember this trip forever, and I'm glad I was able to be a part of it, even for a few minutes. I can't wait to hear the rest of the adventures of Hayden and his Magical Character Menagerie