I'm not sure I'm going to make it! (vent)

[alphamommy]

School doesn't start for 19 more days, and DD and I are at odds yet again (for the millionth time this summer)! 7.5 going on 17!

She would be perfectly content to sit on the couch and watch movies all day. She's complained about the heat every time I've tried to get her to play outside. Today, it's not too hot or humid, and still she won't go outside. She wants to watch a movie.

I'm not sure how much more one-on-one time I can handle. She spent a week with my in-laws, and just got back from 3 days with my sister and BIL. It just seems like she and I are constantly banging heads with one another. She argues about everything, and disputes everything I say.

Sorry, just needed to vent.
Tammy

[Ariel_Fan]

I'm sorry to hear that. Makes me nervous for that age for my daughter. She's 6 with loads of attitude lately. I keep on thinking its because she's tired, etc. I remembered that I didn't start with attitude until I was in middle school.... I hope it gets better.

[NotaGeek]

School doesn't start for 19 more days, and DD and I are at odds yet again (for the millionth time this summer)! 7.5 going on 17!

She would be perfectly content to sit on the couch and watch movies all day. She's complained about the heat every time I've tried to get her to play outside. Today, it's not too hot or humid, and still she won't go outside. She wants to watch a movie.

I'm not sure how much more one-on-one time I can handle. She spent a week with my in-laws, and just got back from 3 days with my sister and BIL. It just seems like she and I are constantly banging heads with one another. She argues about everything, and disputes everything I say.

Sorry, just needed to vent.
Tammy

Tammy, only one of you is the parent. Be strong. :thumbsup:

[GreenBeetle]

I wish I could say it will be over soon, but my daughter is 10 now and we butt heads at least 20X a day! I dread the teenage years!! :bang:

[AZ Disney]

I have to agree with Notageek, there is only one parent here. My DS in 8.5 and he can have lots of attitude as well, but in the end if his Dad and I say something goes than that's what he does. I would turn off the TV and give her some choices (books, buy a workbook for school, art work, swim, etc.) I don't know how hot it is in MI, but here in AZ it's 110 degrees, so during the summer we have to get creative with indoor activities if we aren't in the pool. School started here three days ago. Look on the brightside, you only have 19 days to go.
Good Luck.

[Jimenyfan]

Im sorry your having such a hard time with your DD. My DS has been practicing football 3hrs a day since the beginning of august and it is the opposite of the spectrum. Sometimes kids just need that break before they jump into school. Enjoy the time that you have right now.

[madenny]

Sometimes you have to pick your battles. My DD is 10 and when she starts getting the attitude (which doesn't happen often). I act like she does (sit on the couch and do nothing) Don't get up to get her a drink/snack and show her that being lazy won't get her very far. I did this when she was a toddler and I threw a bigger tantrum than she did [she never threw another one]. Good luck!

[SBETigg]

You will make it. Mine are in the teen years. I've found that it helps if I offer explanations to help them understand. Otherwise, we don't find common ground. They think I'm blindly issuing orders, trying to exert control. Not that you have to explain yourself to your kids, but it helps if they can gain some understanding of why we do things.

For instance, why don't you want her to watch a movie? (no need to tell us). If you simply say "don't watch a movie. Why don't you go outside?" She may take that as you a) controlling her actions and b) trying to get rid of her. But if you say, "You know, I really think we should get some physical activity. It's healthier when we move around," she may get it. Or if her movie-watching interferes with your work time, or whatever. Just tell her why- and she may respond better. And also, find out why she just wants to watch movies. She may have some good reasons, too. This might make the way for some better communication between you. Of course, it's also possible you have all the dialogue going on and you are still at odds. This happens, too. Best wishes for a happy summer!

[alphamommy]

Thanks for the encouragement!

I think I figured out what her problem was (at least for today). She was all upset because I said no to watching a movie, so she brought her "blue blankey" in the living room with her and curled up on the couch to pout. About 10 minutes later, I realized that she was asleep! She's been napping on the couch for close to an hour now, so maybe Aunt Chrissie tired her out, and she was just fighting it!

I'm trying to enjoy my time with her, because I know it will be over before I know it. Hopefully tomorrow will help - we're meeting some of her school friends and their moms at the park.

Thanks,
Tammy

[alphamommy]

The main reason I don't want her to watch a movie is that this is all she wants to do. Last week, it was much hotter outside (mid-90s or so), and she complained about that when I suggested playing out there. Today, it's in the low 80s, a little bit overcast, so I figured it would be a good time to get her out.

Overall, I don't have a problem with movie watching - I just wish she'd do something else!

Tammy

[jax86]

You are not alone, My DD's are 12 and 14 and the attitude does get worse before it gets better!! (sorry!)

I wasn't about to let my kids spend the summer on the couch so I signed them up to volunteer at a camp for disabled kids. they went every day for 4 hours and ended up loving it!! they needed to know how good they have it and that they don't always need to get "paid" for doing a job. they became so attached to the kids and said it was the best thing they ever did.

your DD is a little young for this now, but it may be worth considering in the future. hang in there!!;)

[murphy1]

My three girls are 8, 5 and 3, so I'm in there too, times three!! They can be so sweet and then turn around and be the exorcist girl, LOL.
Mine started school this week, but they don't go out for recess b/c here in GA it has been around 100, at night we try to take them to the pool and now they have some homework. I have also been trying to get them to do chores and things they need to start learning. Glad you are meeting up with people, we have been doing that, too.

[divinedi]

My girls are all older and all starting University/College this Sept., talk about empty nest syndrome all at once:(! I was talking to my neighbour though, who has younger children, and they have implemented a 'point' system. They get points for doing extra things around the house, and unfortunately I don't know how many points they give for what things, you'd have to figure that out, but for dusting 1 point, dishes 2 maybe, cleaning up the yard etc. etc. They have to have say 15 by the end of the week, and then they get their allowance, if they are even one point short, they don't get it. Everyday things like putting back packs away after school, making their beds don't count, but the extras do. She says it's working out very well, it gets the kids doing things around the house, and gets them up and moving too and with outside chores, outside in the fresh air. Wish I'd have heard about it when my kids were younger! Might be worth a try.

Good luck, hang in there, they'll be leaving home for school before you know it :sob: I can do this, I can do this....:mickey:

[Tinkerkel]

My DD is 9 with loads of attitude! Last summer we had a rough time because all she wanted to do was watch TV/movies. Our new rule for the summer is only 1 hour of screens each day. That includes computer, TV, nintendo ds...anything with a screen. During the school year, we cut it back to just 30 minutes a day. This has really worked well at our house. Her attitude still flares up now & then, but not like before.