Any spare pixie dust...just alittle?

[DizNee143]

wow growing up is hard!
so me and my fiance (Pete) moved out in May...and like most people starting out..things are tight!!
we some how always manage to come up with the mortgage payment like 5 days before its due...we buy what we need and thats about it...
then stupid us...we got a puppy...i love her she is great...but wow shes expensive!!! bones, food, vet bills...it really is adding up!!
and im also in my best friends wedding..and sat i gotta shell out money for the bridesmaid dress..she wants hair and makeup done by some chick she picked out and will cost be $165!!! just for hair and make up..crazy!!
plus we have our wedding we have to keep coming up money for this one and that one...
anyway...now the bad news...well kinda bad news..
my fiance Pete lost his job yesterday...we were preparing for it...but didnt expect that when he went to give his boss notice that his boss would just fire him on the spot! that really bothered me..after all the things Pete did for his boss and that company!! his boss just doesnt care and fires him!
so Pete was the main income...but losing the job didnt stop him..hes at work today with his friend he use to work with before this other job...just the pay is like 6 dollars less an hour but its money..
but hes looking to become a truck driver..and i work for NEMF..and it looks like he might become a driver here...great!!! but its a 6 week training course...that means no full time job...
we are gonna be sooooooooooooooo broke...beyond broke..both of our parents said they would help us out...but as much as that would be soo easy...i want us to do it...i have been grubbing off my parents for as long as i can remember and i still do...its the only way me and pete are going to disney in november..my parents are paying for everything...and my best friends wedding my parents said they would buy the dress since they know how broke i am...i love them and am sooo grateful they can help me..but i feel i depend on them to much..and ya i dont seem to know where im going with this anymore...
im just really scared finacally!! we are definetly gonna be a bit off with money for awhile...
if there is any spare pixie dust..just to help us..so we can make it these next few months...
ill probably get a part time job on top of my full time job but it still wont bring us where we were...
why cant life be easier? or for us to be richer?

[bleukarma]

Here is some pixie dust for you!! :pixie::pixie:

I know how hard it is to struggle, I do the full time + part time job too. It will be hard in the begining but you'll get used to it. Sometimes you have to do what you have to do and remember, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel! :mickey:

[PirateLover]

It's always hard starting out. I know that I've felt emotionally ready to move out of my house and possibly get an apt with my long time bf for a while now. But then you start to realize how much your parents really do help you out when you live under their roof and it will be a strain esp when you hit those unforeseen bumps. But that is what makes you stronger as a couple. Since you are still young, trying to get on your feet and all, I think it's OK to accept SOME money from your parents, if they are genuinely offering it out of the kindness of their hearts (I have one friend whose family always wants to give her money to help, but if she lets them then they throw it back in her face all the time. sad.) But I totally understand the feeling of wanting to do it on your own as well. Here is some :pixie: to get you through this rough time and hopefully soon Pete will have a job and you two can start focusing on planning your wedding without these other financial woes hanging over your head!

[DVC2004]

I am sending pixie dust. Over 11 years ago DH and I were a broke couple struggling along- although not fun remember:hug: it will not last forever. Hang in there. Money is such a huge stressor on any relationship- just remember this is a temporary situation. Although everyone needs help once in a while, I think it's great that you want to do it on your own.

[offwego]

Sorry to hear about this. Pixie dust on it's way for you and Pete.

Have you guys sat down and made a monthly budget yet? It can be a big help to really look at where all the money you do have is going and where it has to go etc...not fun but a big help.

Good luck to him on the job hunt!!

[BelleKP]

Boy do I ever know how you feel! :faint:

It's only been 6 years since DH and I got married and started to live together, and some times it is still hard!! Good luck on getting through this time, hopefully some good fortune will come your way!

:pixie: Sprinkle, sprinkle for you! :pixie:

[TINKERBELL_82]

Everything happens for a reason honey, just remember that! He may have gotten laid off because he's going to find the best job in the universe. I'm saying that because the same thing happened to me!! :mickey: I thought it was the end of the world when I lost my job, and I ended up landing a great position at an amazing firm that I have been with for years now!!

Here's so pixie dust for you guys. :tink: Just try to remember to stay positive, love each other, and things will work out.:thumbsup:

[ElenitaB]

Here's some :pixie: for you!

While it's hard on you both now, you are intent on doing the right thing and that is to be commended. I think we learn life's lessons better when things are hard and not when things are easy. So I'll be thinking of you and praying for you!

[SBETigg]

:pixie: for you and Pete. Best wishes that things get better fast.

[Scar]

why cant life be easier?Because it’s not supposed to be.

Walt Disney once said:


All the adversity I've had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me... You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.

Has your fiancé tried Smith and Solomon Driving School in Edison (and Bordentown I think?) They have night and weekend courses

[mrsgaribaldi]

:pixie::pixie::pixie:for things to get better for you both:mickey:

[DizNee143]

Has your fiancé tried Smith and Solomon Driving School in Edison (and Bordentown I think?) They have night and weekend courses

yes he had been looking at a few driving schools also...just trying to find one that isnt sooooo expensive...

[daparish]

Things will get better. DH and I have been married for 10 years and when I think back to what we were both making at that time I am not sure how we survived but we did. I have also had to turn 2 friends down and not stand in their weddings because I knew we could not afford it. It's a tough spot to be in.

Also, did your DF give a 2 week notice. I am not sure what the labor laws are in your state but I know when I left the last bank (investment dept) I worked for I gave a 2 week notice and was told that their procedure was to not have me return but legally they were required to pay me for the 2 week notice so I had a little 2 week vacation between jobs.

[snowflakegirl]

plenty of :pixie: and a whole lot of sympathy headed your way. DH and I were in your boat not all that long ago (and to be perfectly honest we're not all that far out of it). We've been married 3 1/2 years now, most of which I was in grad school for, and he was basically our only source of income. There were a lot of months the rent was scraped together at the last minute, or what exactly we were buying for groceries was a bit of a debate ... and we had to rely on my parents for a bit more support than I would have liked at times ... Even now that I'm out of grad school working full time (and part time evenings and weekends), there are still months that are tighter than others. But it does get better. I'll be keeping my fingers crossed and sending pixie dust your way that things continue to smooth out and that Pete finds a driving school that works out. Good luck and enjoy your Disney trip in November ... let it be a much needed vacation from stress!

[conorsmom2000]

Sending you much pixie dust!! :pixie::pixie: :pixie:

I think I can honestly say that a lot of us have been in your shoes at one point or another and it does get better! I was 22 when I moved out of my parents house and shared an apt with a girlfriend - at the time, I took home $1,000 a month - my rent was $400, my car payment $300 and I had to pay bills and live off the rest! :blush: It was not easy but it was a learning experience. Mike and I have been living together for 13 years, married for (almost) 10 years and life still throws us curve balls (like a plumbing disaster last year that was an unexpected $6,000!!) but, you get through it - and there are always brighter days ahead! It really does get better! I hope things work out for Pete to get into driving school!



I think we learn life's lessons better when things are hard and not when things are easy.

Well said and so true!! :mickey:

[DizNee143]

thank you all so much for the kind words...it definetly lifts my spirits and makes me feel like we really will be ok...
so my company i worked..never called him yesterday like they said they would...so i came into work today and have been calling everyone!! he *should* have an interview later today..just wating for a phone call on that!!! if this doesnt work out...im gonna be mad at my company...cuz i was told it would all work...but then scared..moneywise..but pete is a handyman..he can do anything..
i cant wait for disney..im gonna relax and not think about anything for that week!!! novemeber needs to get here FAST!!
thanx for being here..im happy i have people to talk to about this... :mickey:

[kakn7294]

Good luck to you. We've all been in your shoes and as you move along in life and learn your way, it does get better. :pixie: in the job search!

[faline]

It's really nice you have the support and assitance of your parents - something that we didn't really have when we were first starting out.

You might be surprised how many folks have been down the same road. Keep plugging away! It will all work out!

:pixie::pixie::pixie:

[Jimenyfan]

Wether your just starting out or have been married 20 yrs when the money isnt there its incredible stressful. Like Elenita said we learn lifes lessons best when times are hard. Pixie Dust being sent your way that everything works out.:pixie:

[PAYROLL PRINCESS]

I hope things turn around for you guys soon. The bad thing about working 2 jobs is that you get so used to the income, it's hard to give it up. I've been working 2 jobs for over 20 years now.

[iheartmickey]

BTDT! It's so hard to be a 'grown-up' and be responsible! It's sounds like you're doing the right things though.

Some people I know just throw out their bills and don't pay their mortgage and think their problems will just go away. It takes courage to figure things out. AND it's ok to accept help from others ... on a personal note we just had to ask both of our parents for money last week to help us with the purchase and sale of our home (we're planning on using the proceeds of the sale for all the down payment stuff and they want a good faith payment which we didn't have!!!). It's not easy to ask for help, but sometimes you have to.

What was Pete training .... what kind of work has he done? DH works at Church and Dwight in Princeton ... could put in a good word. I also am a manager at The Vitamin Shoppe in Princeton ... if you want a few hours in the evening we're always hiring!

Everything will work its self out! It may not be in the time you want or how you want but it will be ok!!! :thumbsup:

:pixie::pixie::pixie:

[IloveDisney71]

:pixie:Here's some pixie dust. Things will work out. :pixie: You'll appreciate what you've been through when you look back on this in a few years.
I've been in your shoes and overcame it. My one tip is not to use credit cards! We made that mistake and it was hard to pay them off! BUT we made it and here we are 13 1/2 years later! We look back now and laugh at how much macaroni and cheese we ate because it was so cheap!

[Kairi_7378]

It will be okay. Pete is being proactive with his job search, and things will pick up soon. The first few months after you move out on your own are very rough. Be patient with each other, and eat lots of pasta, and soon you will be looking back at this stressful time and think to yourself, "Wow, we did it!" If you can make it through this, you can make it through anything. I will keep my fingers crossed for you.

[Marilyn Michetti]

Oh, beginning is soooooo hard, and my prayers are with you. 37 years later, we sometimes laugh at how bad it was, but that doesn't help you now. Just know, it WILL get better. Pete will find work, the puppy will love you when you're sad, and soon you'll laugh too.

I think I MIGHT balk at the hairdresser and make up thing tho'. You're doing this gal a favor, for goodness sake. I hope you can re-use the dress. Back in 1970, there was NO WAY you could do anything to those awful dresses to make them wearable again..

Hang in there sweetie!:)

[Sean Riley Taylor's Mom]

Just wanted to send some more good thoughts for you guys.

We have BTDT too. 11 years and 3 kids later, things are good. I second the credit card statement someone else made. We don't even have them anymore. One each for emergency purposes and we stick to that faithfully.

Things will get better. :pixie:

[DizNee143]

What was Pete training .... what kind of work has he done? DH works at Church and Dwight in Princeton ... could put in a good word. I also am a manager at The Vitamin Shoppe in Princeton ... if you want a few hours in the evening we're always hiring!

he has done construction and ran heavy equipment...what is church and dwight??...
we are suppose to hear back today from my company if he got the job!!...
and i might just take you up on that offer about the vitamin shoppe..ill let you know!! :mickey:



I think I MIGHT balk at the hairdresser and make up thing tho'. You're doing this gal a favor, for goodness sake. I hope you can re-use the dress. Back in 1970, there was NO WAY you could do anything to those awful dresses to make them wearable again..

i told my friend what happened and she was is ok with it...i know when she first told me about it..i HAD to use her people..but shes calm down a little..so she is ok with it..i have Petes cousins fiance who is a hairdresser that can do my hair for pretty much nothing..and i know how to do my own make up..so im good..and the dress..we went for the first fitting Saturday..its very pretty..and again i love my parents they are paying for it...

thanx again everyone..for your kind words..its definetly making me feel a bit better about our whole situation(sp?)!!