Need some help from our Jewish Intercotees!

Hammer · #1 05-02-2007, 02:10 PM

Please help this poor Catholic girl out! I have been invited to a presentation (or whatever you call the blessing of a baby in the Jewish faith) and I am a bit at loss and have some questions:

1) What is appropriate attire to wear for this event?

2) Is it customary to bring a gift for the baby or is it considered improper? The couple are Israeli Jews, so that could add another customs wrinkle.

The baby's mother was my old office mate (I recently left the company) and I just do not want to be an embarrassment to her in front of their families here from Israel.

Scar · #2 05-02-2007, 04:29 PM

I’m not Jewish but I think I can help a little. First thing you want to know is if it’s a boy or girl. If it’s a boy there will be a little surgery going on so be prepared for that.

As far as dress I would say dress nice. Most men will probably be in jacket and tie and most women in dresses. (As a man, my rule of thumb is unless your going to a picnic or something that requires a tux, you can’t go wrong with jacket and tie.) I would say a simple gift would be appropriate, something you might give at a shower but fit in a small box. Not sure about the “Israeli Jew” part but I would think if there were a difference, it would be what denomination they are (conservative, reformed, etc.)

Hopefully someone who knows better will come along before the day.

Hammer · #3 05-02-2007, 05:58 PM

What I mean by an Israeli Jew is that I've found Jewish people from Israel tend to approach the practice of Judiaism differently than an American Jewish persons. The company I recently left is headquarted in Tel Aviv, so many people were from Israel and all were Jewish. I always got the impression that the looked down a bit on Americans who are Jewish.

Piglet822 · #4 05-02-2007, 09:11 PM

Christine, my best friend is Jewish and one of the guys I work with is from Israel. I'll see what I can find out for you.
When is the event?

Hammer · #5 05-02-2007, 09:49 PM

Actually, the event is Friday morning and Michal called and invited me this morning, so I am trying to get as much info as I can in a short amount of time. Any info you can get for me, Jeanne, will be greatly appreciated! I know it is not a bris (sp) as the little boy had it done in the hospital (thank goodness). I do not know the child's name, as they will announce it on Friday.

Caroleh · #6 05-02-2007, 10:26 PM

My DH is Jewish and Israeli. I asked him and he said a nice dress, no shoulders exposed. He also said depending on the tradition that the group that they belong to follows(there's 3 different groups...Eastern European, North African and Middle Eastern<Persian, Lebanese, East Indian> all living in Israel) usually the gift is given to the parents for the baby later on in life. My DH is North African origin, but born in Israel.

ElenitaB · #7 05-03-2007, 11:07 AM

Don't know much about Israeli customs and traditions, but having been brought up in a Conservative Jewish household, I can tell you that many people do not buy ANYTHING for the baby prior to its birth. So anything you would have given at a baby shower, would be appropriate now.

DisneyDog · #8 05-03-2007, 12:21 PM

I agree with Ellen, Christine. I'm sure a baby gift, now that the baby has been born, would be greatly appreciated. You could bring any kind of gift you might bring to a baby shower, or if you wanted to, contact a local Temple and see what they have in their gift shop. They usually sell appropriate Judaica items that would make a lovely baby gift/keepsake.

I would dress conservatively; something you might wear to work in an office would probably be appropriate.

I'm surprised they aren't having a bris. That is nothing to worry about, though, if you did have to attend one. The "uncomfortable" part really only lasts 30 seconds at the most, if it is done correctly

Jill

Hammer · #9 05-03-2007, 01:48 PM

Thank you everyone for your advice, I greatly appreciate it

! I am going to wear a skirt which falls to my knees and a twin sweater set, with a change of clothes in my car (Fridays are Jeans days in my new office). The mother told me they had the bris done by a mol in the hospital, so that is not going to happen tomorrow. I'm going shopping tonight to find a gift for the baby. I'll report back tomorrow night with how it went!

(yes, I know this is a symbol of Hanukkah, but we do not have a Star of David smiley

)

DisneyDog · #10 05-03-2007, 02:47 PM

Christine, your outfit sounds perfect. Have a great time! I bet they will have really yummy food!!

Piglet822 · #11 05-03-2007, 04:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DisneyDog

Christine, your outfit sounds perfect. Have a great time! I bet they will have really yummy food!!

Oh, will they ever, lol. My mom's side of the family is Jewish and my grandmother was a fabulous cook!
Okay, now back on topic. Christine, I can't add anything here so go and have fun!

Hammer · #12 05-04-2007, 06:28 PM

I promised to report back with how it went.

First, they did do the bris today. Michal (the baby's mother) sometimes has trouble comprehending some questions in English (she has been here 2.5 years) so it may have been just confusion on her part when I asked her about it. Where the women were situated, though, we could not see the actual circumcision, though we knew it was done when we heard him cry!

It was an Orthodox synagogue. This really didn't surprise me after I thought about it later as most of my co-workers who came over here from Israel are Orthodox. I was dressed perfect for the occasion, though, and did not look out of place, thanks to you all

. Another of my co-workers helped me out on where I should sit, as it seems there are rules on where a woman can be in an Orthodox service (I think they are in a separate room for normal Sabbath Services?). There wasn't any English translation for me to follow as the whole thing was in Hebrew, so I just responded Amen when the other women spoke and Mazel Tov at the end like everyone else

! The baby was named Adam Tuviah (I think that translates to Tobias).

The food was good, but not as good as food have had from area Jewish restaurants/delicatessens. I am a fan of lox and whitefish salad, but this whitefish salad was only mediocre. As an aside, best whitefish salad I have ever had was from a delicatessen my parents found down in Florida called Jo-Els. If you are in St. Petersburg, you should find it! They had a spread of various breads, along with a Challah loaf that the baby's father said a blessing over and the bread was then distributed to all tables. As I mentioned before, there were lox, whitefish salad, as well as another fish I didn't recognize, and egg salad. The also had cheese blintzes which were

.

Thank you everyone for all your help! Intercotees are truly the best

!

DisneyDog · #13 05-07-2007, 11:45 AM

I'm glad you enjoyed yourself! I was surprised when you said the bris was done in the hospital. Makes more sense that it would have been done by a mohel. We're not really religious at all, and my son even had a bris with a mohel (in our home). They also tend to be much better at the circumcision than a doctor, because that's all they do. It literally only takes them a few seconds and it's over. Much better for the baby that way

What did you end up bringing?

Jill