How to know your'e growing older

[Disney4us2]

In looking for a paper in we need for my father. I found this that he saved from my mom's things. It gave me a good laugh. Just had to share.

Everything hurts and what doesn't hurt, doesn't work. The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals.
Your little black book containes only names ending in M.D.
You get winded playing chess
Your children begin to look middle aged
Your mind makes contracts your body can't meet
A dripping faucet causes an uncontrollable bladder urge
You know all the answers, but nobody asks you the questions
Your favorite part of the newspaper is "25 years ago today..."
You turn off the light for economic rather than romantic reasons
You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it started
Your knees buckle, and your belt won't
Dialing long distance wears you out
Your best part of the day is over when your alarm clock goes off
You burn the midnight oil after 9pm
Your back goes out more than you do
A fortune teller offers to read your face
Your pacemaker makes the garade door go up when you watch a pretty girl go by
The little gray-haired lady you help across the street is your wife
You get your exercise acting as a pallbearer for your friends who exercise
You sink you teeth in to a steak and they stay there.

[Ed]

When you don't recognize the person in front of you, and the only thing in front of you is a mirror. :old:

:D

[Donald]

Thanks for the chuckle!:mickey:

[VWL Mom]

:thumbsup:

[Janmac]

This is a great list. I was thinking there were a few things wrong with it -

like your children begin too look middle aged could read "are eligible for social security".

Or the "25 years ago today . . . " is probably not long enough, should be 50 years

And then got to thinking: can you hear the kids today? What's a newspaper? What's long distance dialing? What's social security?

:D

Jan

[BrowncatP]

When something that you used is displayed in the Smithsonian Institution. I had a Julia lunchbox, and saw it in a case with other lunchboxes at the museum.