Preschool/Peanut Allergy Conundrum

[Lacy]

My 3.5 year old DS has a peanut allergy and currently attends KinderCare. We have been happy there but it is located next to my husband's office which will be moving so we need to find a new preschool. I took DS for a trial day at a Montessori school yesterday and was really impressed. It seems like he would be more stimulated at the Montessori and learn a lot more than at KinderCare. I liked all the staff but the only issue is that it is not a nut free school.

DS is really aware of his peanut allergy and knows not to eat nuts. He tells people that nuts make him sick but being responsible for not eating nuts is a lot for a 3.5 year old. I'm pretty confident that the school would watch him and do their best but an accident could happen. Luckily he does not seem to be so allergic that just being around peanuts would cause a reaction but we don't know if that could change. And it is a school where I pack his lunch so I would know that there would always be "safe" food available for him.

I am really torn between trying to provide the best education and ensure that he is safe. But I also realize he can't live in a bubble forever and we'd have to cross this bridge sometime.

Just curious if any intercotees have experience with peanut allergies and preschools. Thanks for "listening".

[NewDVCowner]

Have you talked with the teachers at the school? When I was teaching pre school while in college we had a child with allergies. We asked the other parents to stop sending that food to school. The pre-school may be willing to work with you on that.

[ibelieveindisneymagic]

Is the issue that parents are bringing in treats for the class to share, or just that since everyone brings their own lunch, parents could send peanut products?

If parents are bringing treats to school for everyone, I would ask that it be changed. Not just for peanut issues, but other allergies, intolerances, food choices, etc. I have a mild peanut allergy and have never felt comfortable eating anything someone made at their house, you just never know.

If it that parents could send peanut products in lunches, that it more of a teaching for your son, not to share food to eat something that he didn't bring. Again, that should be a good lesson for the whole school.

I wouldn't let it decide your school, go where you think DS is going to be happiest, where they have the most qualified teachers and the best programming.

[Kenny1113]

Both DSs went to Montessori preschool and I couldn't have been happier! While they were not a nut free school either they did have restrictions on sweets and junk food. Did you ask them how they would handle having a child in the class who has an allergy? I have heard of classes where kids could not bring peanut containing items, but the school itself was not nut free.

[Lacy]

Thanks. I'm really leaning towards putting him in the montessori and just working with the teachers and director to make sure that he has options available and knowing when he has to eat his own snacks versus the ones that others bring. It is kind of strange in that each student is assigned one snack day a month to bring morning snack for the school so I wouldn't necessarily want to ask for too many restrictions just for DS.

And kids bring their own lunch so I may suggest that he just be that there be a peanut free lunch table or portion of the table.

I've heard such great things about Montessori programs that I wouldn't want him to miss out because of his allergy.

[Kairi_7378]

My son is in a nut-free classroom at a non nut-free school (if that makes sense.) There are signs on all of the doors and the fridge in his classroom, and instructions to all caregivers in several places. Additionally, each teacher in the school gets trained in the use of the epi-pen once a year. My advice is that if you think this is the right choice for your little guy to make an appointment with the school director and talk to her about the allergy. I am sure this is not the first time that she has had to deal with this issue. There may be a policy in place to deal with the issue or you may have to work with her to decide what is best for your son.

In my son's class, the two "nut free" children do not sit at a seperate table but they aren't always allowed to eat treats brought from the outside, especially ones that don't have ingredient lists. However, the parents have a supply of "safe" treats at the school. One mom has sent in a supply of muffins that can be frozen and thawed in the microwave for birthdays so that they don't feel so left out.

Good luck!

[BrerGnat]

Schools take allergies very seriously, particularly nut allergies.

Since your son is only in preschool, you've not been "on the school scene" for too long. You'll realize very quickly that your son is NOT the only peanut allergy kid at, basically, any school. There will be others. It's a big deal nowadays and most schools are equipped to handle it.

This is the point at which you get really involved as a parent with the school. You'll probably have to do this at every school, every year. Every new teacher your son has will have to know about this, so now's your chance to start the dialogue. It's really not a big deal. Most schools are either nut free or have a "nut free zone" in the eating areas. If your son requires an Epi Pen on site, make sure you go through the correct procedure to have it there, with instructions for its use, etc.

I don't have any food allergy kids, but they have always had a classmate with one, and we've always been made aware of it as parents. Generally, "home made" treats are not even allowed to be brought in for the class. Stuff has to be prepackaged and labeled at our schools for birthdays and class parties. There have always been nut free tables at our kids' schools over the years.

I would send him where you think he would get the best education. No matter where you go, they will work with you on the allergy.

[minnie04]

My children don't suffer from this, but my DS has a friend in his class that does. She has been in the same class with him since Pre-K. What her mom did besides talking to the teacher was sent a note home to all the parents in the class explaining what she had and how to avoid any reactions. We all knew not to send anything to school with any peanut in it. I think this is becoming more common in children, so parents are aware of the dangers the children face and usually comply with your wishes. In the note home. I would also explain what happens with your son when he has come in touch with peanuts. This way parents can explain it to their children (on their level) and they will be more understanding if it ever happens in the class room... You would be surprised how little ones want to help and want to make sure it doesn’t happen to him. My son would always tell me “mom remember NO PEANUTS!! Lauren can't have them she will get sick and break out in a bad rash" it was cute that he cared and still cares for her so much...

Good luck!! Just remember to make everyone
aware and that will help a lot…:mickey:

[Mickey'sGirl]

I have nut allergies. I would not send my child to a facility that could not guarantee a nut free environment. He is too young to advocate for himself (a brownie looks like a brownie, even if it's made with nuts). Thankfully, up in Ontario, all regulated preschools and public schools have been nut free for at least the past 15 years, so it is not an issue. It would be a worry if there wasn't a guarantee of oversight from the administration. I would only send him to a nut free facility. Just my :twocents:

[Georgesgirl1]

Sorry E is having to change schools and you are having to deal with this added stress.
I teach at a non-nut free preschool, but have had kids the past two years with nut allergies in my class. I am super careful about it though. I know the kids who usually have peanut butter in their lunches and make sure they are seated as far away from each other as possible. I also make sure the kids wash their hands really well and that I clean everything that might have been touched during lunch.
I think if you talk to the teachers at the school, they can tell you how they deal with this situation. There are probably several other kids in the school with nut allergies, so I am sure they have a plan in place.

[TheVBs]

Talk to the teachers there and find out how they handle nut allergies. They're so prevalent now that I can't imagine they haven't dealt with it before. A school doesn't need to be nut free to be able to accommodate a nut allergy. If you're comfortable with their plan, then you can send him to the school you think is best.

[Lacy]

Turns out that the school decided that they wouldn't take him due to his allergy. We told them that we don't know if he would have a severe reaction from someone touching him after having peanut butter and we just wanted to be confident that they would do their best to make sure he didn't eat peanuts. We are pretty sure that he is not that sensitive due to being around peanuts galore at baseball games. But we told the director that the doctors have said that any kid with a peanut allergy could possibly have a reaction just from touch. And that was enough for them to decide that they didn't want to deal with it at their school.

I am disappointed because I really think he would have thrived in the environment. Now we're back to square one looking at more schools. I never knew finding a preschool would be so time consuming and difficult.

[Mickey'sGirl]

So sorry Lacy. I'm sure you will find something great for your son!

BTW our experience with Montessori was less than positive ... They asked my oldest son to leave because he is Autistic and they weren't willing to "take him on any longer". A school that is not willing to go the mile for a child is not worth your child's time in my opinion. Keep looking and you will find the right place for him! :thumbsup:

[BrerGnat]

So sorry Lacy. I'm sure you will find something great for your son!

BTW our experience with Montessori was less than positive ... They asked my oldest son to leave because he is Autistic and they weren't willing to "take him on any longer". A school that is not willing to go the mile for a child is not worth your child's time in my opinion. Keep looking and you will find the right place for him! :thumbsup:

I have heard a lot of stories like this. Seems the Montessori way is only intended for children who conform to their ideals. Ironically, Autistic kids are probably the type who benefit most from that type of learning environment, but I digress...

Look into the Public School system where you live. Many times, they have preschools attached to elementary schools and might have programs your child can attend. You can be assured that the PUBLIC school system is required to take food allergies seriously and will have a plan in place.

[Kairi_7378]

I'm sorry to read that, Lacy. I know that the peanut allergy is a difficult thing for you to deal with, but it is such a common thing in the preschool world that I never would imagine a school turning a child away for that reason.

[TheVBs]

Really sorry to hear that they said this to you! But, the reality is, they just did you the favor of finding out their shortcomings before you put your child there, rather than halfway through the year. It doesn't sound like the kind of place you want him to go. I second looking into a public preschool.