I need some honest advice

[pink]

Hey everyone!

Now, I have written about my job before and the numerous problems I have with it in the past. I am currently twenty and going to school for journalism. Right now I am a first-semester junior. I have worked at the same part-time job since I started college.

I am a receptionist at a car dealership but over the years I have dealt with many bad experiences with them. I have gone through everything with them from: co-workers setting me up, managers trying to actually harm me (he was fired), men trying to stalk and date me online who worked at the job (who were twice my age), verbal assault (being cursed at my co-worker while the manager just sits back and doesn't interfere), dealing with rude customers every day, watching my business rip off people and now today a co-worker walked up to my boss behind my back and told him that "so-and-so (my name) is such a 'bad' (he actually said a curse word) receptionist." I couldn't believe it. I haven't confronted him on it and I don't know if I should but I feel demeaned and I can't be here any longer.

My job is all about politics (which I am sure many of you can relate to). The HR department is related to other managers who are all buddy-buddy and no matter what the little people say, nothing really ever changes.

I am tired of working here but I am torn about a decision I need to make which is why I am asking for advice.

I really want to quit my job now but my only concerns are I am leaving my income. This job is easy (apart from the bad things I have to experience every day). However, I almost feel like being that I am a junior I could start doing internships until I graduate for money and of course, work experience. But I know that internships don't make a lot of money and that some are unpaid so I am concerned.

If you were me, would you leave? I just hate the feeling of dreading coming to work every day and wanting to cry when I get here because the people are honestly terrible. They live up to every used-car salesman stereotype there are.

Any advice would be wonderful and I am sorry this is so long. :mickey:

[PirateLover]

Hi Pink!!!! Life is too short to let yourself be so stressed out. I know that you need the income but you do NOT need the headache. I am in a similar situation although my job is my career. However I've decided that I will be leaving, even if another job is not lined up, because I am so unhappy.
Could you pick up a part time job somewhere else? I remember you talking about online classes, are all of your classes online? You could look for part time jobs at places like department stores and grocery stores in the meantime if you have a flexible schedule.... I know very few people who don't have some kind of work stress, but the situation you are in is downright unhealthy. I would get out ASAP.

[NotaGeek]

If its as bad as you say, you are protected as an employee at your job ... you are being harassed and if I was you I would walk right into your HR department and make a formal complaint, if there's no HR department erson that will listen (which in itself is illegal) Google for the state department that handles employee complaints and file with them. You are instantly protected for wrongful termination ... and why let it stand? If you are brave enough to complain think of the other women/employees that can also benefit from standing up for your rights ... in the end, you hate the job and want to leave anyway. I have had a couple of friends that went through the same thing at car dealerships, its an unfortunate Boys Club, and to be honest it's disgusting.

[SBETigg]

With all that going on, I wonder why you're still there. Jobs are hard to find, I know, but nothing is worth that kind of stress and endangerment.

If you do need the income, though, don't rely on internships. Look for another job. I worked through college as a bank teller. Banks have great hours for students, and they pay better than retail. Something to consider, if you need ideas. Even better if you can find another receptionist position somewhere. It's up to you to decide if you can tough it out where you are until you find another paying position (and maybe take Michael's advice and file some complaints) or if you need to give up the paycheck and leave immediately. Best wishes.

[PirateLover]

If its as bad as you say, you are protected as an employee at your job ... you are being harassed and if I was you I would walk right into your HR department and make a formal complaint, if there's no HR department erson that will listen (which in itself is illegal) Google for the state department that handles employee complaints and file with them. You are instantly protected for wrongful termination ... and why let it stand? If you are brave enough to complain think of the other women/employees that can also benefit from standing up for your rights ... in the end, you hate the job and want to leave anyway. I have had a couple of friends that went through the same thing at car dealerships, its an unfortunate Boys Club, and to be honest it's disgusting.
Great suggestion. I should've added that I wouldn't go quietly either. I would definitely file a complaint listing all of these grievances and make one last stand. Make yourself be heard by SOMEONE. Whether it works or not, In all likelihood they will hate you for it and you still won't be happy working there and will probably leave, but you would've done the right thing and perhaps made the situation better for any young ladies who follow you at that place.

[Disneyfun]

If its as bad as you say, you are protected as an employee at your job ... you are being harassed and if I was you I would walk right into your HR department and make a formal complaint, if there's no HR department erson that will listen (which in itself is illegal) Google for the state department that handles employee complaints and file with them. You are instantly protected for wrongful termination ... and why let it stand? If you are brave enough to complain think of the other women/employees that can also benefit from standing up for your rights ... in the end, you hate the job and want to leave anyway. I have had a couple of friends that went through the same thing at car dealerships, its an unfortunate Boys Club, and to be honest it's disgusting.

Great suggestions!! I would definetely make a complaint to the HR, then to the state rep. Then, get out of dodge as soon as possible.

On the sneaky side, as a journalism major, I might sneak a digital recorder into the conversation with the HR department and even managers. Then, take those recordings and write a wonderful expose on the working conditions at that location. Take it to a local paper, present it to a local attorney, post it on a blog, send it to the local TV station...the possibilities are endless and could even land you a job in the field you want to go into!! :thedolls::thedolls::thedolls:

Go get 'em!!! Stand up for yourself and make them listen, one way or the other!

[crazypoohbear]

File a FORMAL, i.e. written complaint with HR. get a copy of your complaint so down the road they can't say it never happened. Follow up with your attorney generals office or the department that covers workplace issues. Document everything! Names, dates, times, what was said etc.
If things don't get better after your complain you might be able to quit and collect unemployment because you left a hostile work environment.
As hard as it might be, if you depend on your income for living don't quit until you have something lined up.
Do not confront the person who made that statement. Go directly to HR. If you confront the person they could turn it around and claim that YOU are harrassing him. Don't give them ammo.
And Do NOT bring a tape recorder into any meeting. IT is unlawful to tape someone without consent, it is a federal offense and you could be charged with a felony.
Good luck and keep acting in a proffessional manner while you are there.

[MegaDisney]

I just hate the feeling of dreading coming to work every day...

Welcome to adulthood... :D (Sorry I couldn't resist)

I think the other posters advice about filing a complaint is the best idea.

Let us know how it works out.

[murphy1]

I agree with everyone, file a complaint and get out!! You are obviously not a quitter and no one will hold this against you.

I wanted to offer you some Journalism advice, too, if that's okay. I have a Journalism and PR BA degree. You don't have to wait until you are further on in your schooling, be proactive! Get yourself into as many opportunities as you can in the field! Local newspapers and TV stations will pay you (not a lot but will pay something) and give you good experience. Also get as much digital media/computer type experience as you can, print is not as plentiful as it once was. One of my friends worked for the obituary dept, another friend did odd jobs and now she is hosting a TV talk show (and ended up in the same town I'm currently in). I also think it's a versatile degree, b/c I've used my skills in other fields and I am a good writer, which comes in handy to this day. Also, go to lunch or meet with others who are established in the field, they will help you.
Good luck!!

[PAYROLL PRINCESS]

Working in HR I get a lot of disgruntled employees. A lot of what they say is BS because they are trying to get back at someone. Now don't get upset because I said that; I just want to point out that your best offense is to have someone as a witness who will sign a statement. Unfortunately all too often it is a clique that will stick together. In my job I'm not out at the locations, I'm stuck in the corporate office. So I have to also take into account if we've had other people complain about this person, my own personal dealings with them etc. If I feel it's a legit complaint, I'll go to that persons manager and ask them to handle it.

You can document what's happened making sure you have dates and who may have been around to hear it and give all this info to unemployment. Even if you quit (as my sis pointed out) you can claim it's a hostile work environment. Also, if you've had any health issues that you have had to go to a doctor about, and if the doctor said it's stress related, have the doctor document that as well. You can file for unemployment and they'll automatically try to deny it. Make sure you appeal and take it to the next level. This is only if you can't get another job ASAP. Too much stress can really do a number on your body and you are too young to have to deal with that!! Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

[pink]

Hi Pink!!!! Life is too short to let yourself be so stressed out. I know that you need the income but you do NOT need the headache. I am in a similar situation although my job is my career. However I've decided that I will be leaving, even if another job is not lined up, because I am so unhappy.
Could you pick up a part time job somewhere else? I remember you talking about online classes, are all of your classes online? You could look for part time jobs at places like department stores and grocery stores in the meantime if you have a flexible schedule.... I know very few people who don't have some kind of work stress, but the situation you are in is downright unhealthy. I would get out ASAP.

I'm sorry to hear about your job too and I feel the same way as you, even though I don't have another job lined up I just want to get out! I am still taking one online class, the rest of my classes are in school.


I have had a couple of friends that went through the same thing at car dealerships, its an unfortunate Boys Club, and to be honest it's disgusting.

I second that. It really is gross. I feel so violated every time I go to work. I wish I could just file a complaint but this is such a small company is would almost be a joke. I almost don't even want to complain, just leave and since I am only a part-time employee I can't collect any unemployment or anything.


If you do need the income, though, don't rely on internships. Look for another job. I worked through college as a bank teller.

Thanks, I wasn't sure if that was a good idea. I like the idea of being a bank teller. They seem to have good hours.


On the sneaky side, as a journalism major, I might sneak a digital recorder into the conversation with the HR department and even managers. Then, take those recordings and write a wonderful expose on the working conditions at that location. Take it to a local paper, present it to a local attorney, post it on a blog, send it to the local TV station...the possibilities are endless and could even land you a job in the field you want to go into!!

Haha, I would love to do that but like someone else said, it is illegal. Just recently the company have this big article printed in a car magazine saying how great they're to their customers and they have it posted everywhere, it makes me fume everytime I see it.


I wanted to offer you some Journalism advice, too, if that's okay. I have a Journalism and PR BA degree. You don't have to wait until you are further on in your schooling, be proactive! Get yourself into as many opportunities as you can in the field! Local newspapers and TV stations will pay you (not a lot but will pay something) and give you good experience. Also get as much digital media/computer type experience as you can, print is not as plentiful as it once was. One of my friends worked for the obituary dept, another friend did odd jobs and now she is hosting a TV talk show (and ended up in the same town I'm currently in). I also think it's a versatile degree, b/c I've used my skills in other fields and I am a good writer, which comes in handy to this day. Also, go to lunch or meet with others who are established in the field, they will help you.
Good luck!!

Did your friend do the obits before she graduated? Because I really wouldn't mind doing those or the wedding annoucements or something along those lines. I just thought you had to be a graduate to get those jobs. I really am going to look into that when I get off of this site haha. Thanks for the advice.



You can document what's happened making sure you have dates and who may have been around to hear it and give all this info to unemployment. Even if you quit (as my sis pointed out) you can claim it's a hostile work environment. Also, if you've had any health issues that you have had to go to a doctor about, and if the doctor said it's stress related, have the doctor document that as well. You can file for unemployment and they'll automatically try to deny it. Make sure you appeal and take it to the next level. This is only if you can't get another job ASAP. Too much stress can really do a number on your body and you are too young to have to deal with that!! Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

I bet you get a lot of complaints. As for getting people to witness these acts the only problem is these people are all in cahoots (sp) together and most of them are close friends. All of the other times things have happened, I have been alone as my desk is far away from everyone else's and no one is close to me.



After I wrote this I started researching summer camps in my area because I did that one summer and had the time of my life being a counselor. I found a few and was thinking of doing that for the upcoming season and maybe just quitting soon and working on my school work until the next job starts.

As for quitting, what is the best way to do it? Should I leave two weeks notice, write a letter? I've never quit a job before. They have usually just been seasonal.

Thanks for answering everyone. I'll let you know what I chose to do. :mickey:

[PAYROLL PRINCESS]

I'd definitely put it in writing. You can also put in it that due to the stressful situation you find yourself in you can no longer comfortably work there as you feel it's a hostile work environment. I'd email and give it to them in person. That way you'd have it documented and if they don't do anything, they are condoning it. At the very least, even though you are leaving, they should interview you to find out what you are talking about.

Have you checked to make sure you can't get unemployment? Even though you are part time, in a lot of cases you CAN collect.

[murphy1]

My friend wasn't even a journalism student when she did the obit job! Back then, they would hire you without a degree. I thought of another thing you might want to do that I did. That was temp work, I even got to work for a magazine. It was a lot of grunt work, filing and maintaining records, but I did get a few interviews out of it (It was Florida Trend magazine). I also interviewed for a local tv station to do PT production work. I've thought about checking out CNN again, but it's too far too drive for me now. I know that a lot of people like to mentor those who are starting out. Oh, I ended up working in the insurance business more than any other, doing marketing and PR work mostly.

[SandmanGStefani24]

alright Pink...i am one of the few who knows your situation first-hand. I worked in the car business for 4 years. i am not better for doing so, but i learned so much about life and dealing with tough situations. here's what i learned that can help you.

1. it's just a job. what you do is merely a means to survive. it doesnt define you nor does it add/remove any value to or from you.

2. no job is irreplaceable. just as you can be fired at any point, you can fire your employer at any point. everyone is always looking for their next job. surf the web, apply at dream jobs, and keep your eyes/ears peeled.

3. vacations and time off are a must. i just got back from WDW and i now have the will to live and work again. a day or two off not thinking about work once are necessary to surviving a job you hate.

4. it's ok to cry, but it's not ok to accept that as "part of the job". we all get down about work at times. but when it's an everyday thing it's time to take a walk.

5. the car business is filled with low-lifes and scum. that being said, does the opinion or comments of losers matter one bit? do your loved ones and family think the same? didn't think so...

6. live has phases. this one may ****...but there's always a great big beautiful tomorrow. when the light at the end of the tunnel is about to disappear : that's when you find your greatest strength. once you find that, nothing else matters.

keep looking for your next job, and know that the people who's opinion and thoughts really matter are standing in your corner.
:beer:

we're all with you!

[Dznygrl79]

First take a deep breath, it is rough to be in that position. However I think you hit the nail on the head with internships, just remember that many are unpaid, however the experiance you gain will give you an upper hand later. Search for paid internships, try to keep in your field and stick with larger companies, it is harder (not impossible but harder) for some of these things to occur in a larger orginazation.

I wish you the best of luck finding a great internship!

[Rekenna]

Hi Pink! I'm so sorry you are having such a rough time, I've been there so I can deeply sympathize. I was a bad job magnet, there I've said it!:) But, it will get better, with perseverence, determination and blessings from above it will work out. It took me 8 years of applying to a very large, very global, very good company where I live, last year I received a job there and it's everything I worked so hard for. I went to school (while I had my oldest son) for 5 years straight, no breaks to earn a BBA and a MBA, it will happen, don't give up.

Now, for the next steps...Once you are ready to go, leave 2 weeks notice, even if something happens that you can't stay the whole 2 weeks, this is the most professional thing to do-always be professional even when those around you are not. As others have posted document everything, keep a CYA file (this is a good idea for any job you have). I was a bank teller, it was decent money, you are treated respectfully and you gain insight into a viable profession and also gain great customer service skills, also most banks offer pretty good benefits. My next door neighbor has her degree in journalism, she has written numerous articles for online publications, she worked as a marketing manager for an insurace company, left the company and began her own media business and is very successful, if you write well your career options are endless.

Chin up! Good luck!:thumbsup:

[pink]

Thanks again everyone. You are all so nice and make me feel so much better. It is amazing how one rude persons comment can bring you down so much.


6. live has phases. this one may ****...but there's always a great big beautiful tomorrow. when the light at the end of the tunnel is about to disappear : that's when you find your greatest strength. once you find that, nothing else matters

Sandman- I don't if it is because I am overly emotional today or what but that almost made me cry because it was so true! Thank you for opening my eyes. :mickey: