Easily offended?

[Granny Jill A]

I've noticed a shift in the attitude of people who post to websites. Not only are the comments becoming mean and nasty, but people's reactions are much more volatile.

We are so easily offended by the most trivial things anymore. Someone expresses an opinion and ten people jump on line to pound that person to a pulp because they were offended by something that was said.

Why? I wonder if it's because we are feeling powerless to change things in our lives, so we lash out anonymously. We say stuff on line that we wouldn't dream of saying to someone's face.

Comments that people used to laugh at or shrug off now cause howls of outrage. Even the most innocuous subjects are potential landmines. Perhaps you say that hockey bores you. Well, get ready to run for your life. Instead of a reasonable discussion about why you find that sport boring, you are treated to a nasty personal attack because you don't like what THEY like. (sigh)

When I first started posting on Intercot, I was pleased with the civilized discourse. I hope we can return to those days.

[faline]

Generally, I think folks on Intercot are quite nice. It's one of the reasons I spend so much time here.

The reality is, though, that we're in a difficult, period of time. Many folks are quite stressed - needing to deal with lowered home valuations; decreased long-term savings; higher costs for basic necessecities; and the fear that jobs will be lost - if they haven't already been lost. Unfortunately, the feelings evoked by stressors are sometimes misplaced and come out as anger in other places or in increased sensitivity to the comments of others.

[MississippiDisneyFreak]

I agree that most of the people on this website are very nice, but sometimes people do get bent out of shape for silly things....I think its good to get varying opinions but this is my online happy place, so it bugs me when people get nasty......

[tinklover]

Generally, I think folks on Intercot are quite nice. It's one of the reasons I spend so much time here.

The reality is, though, that we're in a difficult, period of time. Many folks are quite stressed - needing to deal with lowered home valuations; decreased long-term savings; higher costs for basic necessecities; and the fear that jobs will be lost - if they haven't already been lost. Unfortunately, the feelings evoked by stressors are sometimes misplaced and come out as anger in other places or in increased sensitivity to the comments of others.

Very well said


I agree that most of the people on this website are very nice, but sometimes people do get bent out of shape for silly things....I think its good to get varying opinions but this is my online happy place, so it bugs me when people get nasty......

:ditto:

[SBETigg]

I'm not usually sensitive, but I did get slightly offended on a thread recently. I feel we're all adult enough to express opinions and still go on in good spirits.

The thing with not chatting about opinions in person is that emotions aren't visible and sometimes even use of emoticons can seem really patronizing instead of how they might have been intended, in a playful way or a good-spirited discussion sort of way. I see it all as good-spirited discussion. I'm a lively but good-natured discusser in life and sometimes that jumps out on the page. Plus, we all might consider how our own seemingly innocent comments could offend others before saying them. It's always safer to think before we type and avoid potential issues.

[mic_keyfan]

WOW! I guess I've learned something today! I've never noticed any hostility out here (in Intercot). Maybe I am just naive, or just not reading the posts that are negative. I love reading and posting at Intercot.:mickey:

[pink]

Granny Jill, I know exact what you mean about people being cruel on the web these days. However, some other discussion boards on the web are so much worse than this. :mickey:

[chrisb26]

I know what you mean, although I will say that Intercot is still worlds better then some sites I've seen where even the moderators attack people. I've always thought this place for the most part is very friendly which is why I love it here because I don't have to worry about being attacked for things I say.

I think part of the problem sometimes is because over the internet it is difficult to read sarcasm. For the most part most of what people say doesn't really bother me and if it does I wouldn't attack somebody I just have to remember that everybody has different opinions and there is no reason you can't tell somebody your opinion in a calm and friendly manner.

But as I said Intercot is a very friendly place and even though sometimes people do go on an attack it is usually limited and it doesn't happen very often.

For that reason :rocks:

[Disney Doll]

I haven't noticed a change in Intercot friendliness. For the most part I have always found really nice people here. There are certain hot topics that always lead to argument no matter how they are worded and while it's unfortunate I think it's human nature. I have pretty thick skin and I never take offense to someone disagreeing. In fact I enjoy the debate. :rocks:

[mic_keyfan]

I haven't noticed a change in Intercot friendliness. For the most part I have always found really nice people here. There are certain hot topics that always lead to argument no matter how they are worded and while it's unfortunate I think it's human nature. I have pretty thick skin and I never take offense to someone disagreeing. In fact I enjoy the debate. :rocks:

Well said, I say go with the debate!!:cool:

[Mousefever]

I've noticed a shift in the attitude of people who post to websites. Not only are the comments becoming mean and nasty, but people's reactions are much more volatile.

We are so easily offended by the most trivial things anymore. Someone expresses an opinion and ten people jump on line to pound that person to a pulp because they were offended by something that was said.

Why? I wonder if it's because we are feeling powerless to change things in our lives, so we lash out anonymously. We say stuff on line that we wouldn't dream of saying to someone's face.

Comments that people used to laugh at or shrug off now cause howls of outrage. Even the most innocuous subjects are potential landmines. Perhaps you say that hockey bores you. Well, get ready to run for your life. Instead of a reasonable discussion about why you find that sport boring, you are treated to a nasty personal attack because you don't like what THEY like. (sigh)

When I first started posting on Intercot, I was pleased with the civilized discourse. I hope we can return to those days.

I'm totally offended by this thread! I enjoy wallowing in my own sensitivity, having very little sense of humor, and attacking people for not sharing all of my opinions exactly. I find it offensive that you think people are becoming more easily offended.

P.S. Does hockey bore you? That offends me.

P.P.S. I hope that sarcasm and tongue-in-cheek humor doesn't offend anyone! ;)


Amy

[bicker]

With regard to the Internet in general, not necessarily Intercot, I've seen similar threads to this one posted regularly over the last twenty years or so, ever since the Internet was opened up to the general public. I think this election has evoked a very substantial increase in hostility in political threads, but beyond political threads, I don't see much of a difference.

[Georgesgirl1]

I think part of the problem sometimes is because over the internet it is difficult to read sarcasm.

I agree that part of the problem is that sarcasm can't be read on a post.

That being said, even when things get slightly heated on Intercot, the moderators handle it well. Some other sites can be brutal!

[Dixie Springs]

Usually, hot topics end up in cyber-nastiness (e.g., religion, politics, or Stitch). Intercot mods have a keen sense when a thread is going that way, and usually extinguish the flames in time. I do, however, feel bad when some Intercot newbie sincerely posts a 5th-gate rumor and gets a "yeah, right" string of sarcasm from Disnerds.

[kakn7294]

I think another side of the issue is that often, written word can often and easily be interpreted incorrectly from how the writer meant it to read. Since there's no voice inflection, facial expression, or other indicators of mood present in written word, it's easy to put your own spin on it. I may read a post as funny, someone else sees it as sarcasm, and a third person sees it as being offensive. I try to watch what I say and how I say it but I'm sure that sometimes it's read incorrectly - we all do it.

[PirateLover]

I did feel that at one point I started seeing some more "mean spirited" posts a few months ago. However I haven't noticed it as much lately. I think it depends on what topics you read, how often you participate in discussions etc. Sometimes I get reeled in because I just can't stand "Internet bullies"-those people who probably sit at a keyboard all day and it seems like their only purpose in life is to seek out ways to goad people into anger. I realize that by responding to such posts I am only "feeding the troll" so to speak, but sometimes you simply can't help it. That being said Intercot is still the nicest place on the 'Net as far as I can tell. :thumbsup:

[SandmanGStefani24]

i think some people get braver when posting because the worst that can happen is they get a post back. in the real world bad things can happen when confrontation occurs. so, some people can get rather nasty on posts.
that being said, intercot is so much nicer a place than other boards. in fact, I think this is the nicest and most pleasant board on the net. :number1:
people seem to be allowed to have an opinion, and are better about expressing it. even a cynical (person) like myself finds it hard to be negative about anything when on Intercot or at the World. I am more careful about how I act or what I say and I think it's contagious.

[pixiesmimi]

I will have to say that there have been times lately that I've almost decided to quit posting on here because of things said in some threads but then decided that I should just stop when things get a little touchy and let the others have the discussion without me. I guess a lot of people are stressed now and this may be the safest way to let off steam sometimes. But you are correct. This is one of the best sites to be on. :thumbsup:

I catch myself going back and rereading my posts sometimes before hitting the submit button to see how it sounds and if I think it will offend someone, I edit it. I guess we don't realize how some of our words might sound to some when we don't really intend it to. That is why I stay with this site (besides loving Disney) :) because people are pretty considerate on here and the site itself has high morals. (It's addictive too!) :D I've read some pretty disgustive things on other sites but never on here.

[bouncer]

I will have to say that there have been times lately that I've almost decided to quit posting on


I too censor myself. At time when I would love to put my :twocents: in I typically refrain from posting at all so as not to add fuel to a fire.

[TinkerbellT421]

I also agree (I am sure I am guilty for it and Im sorry), but whether be it on here, the net in general or even in real life. Sometimes things are said not really meaning "attitude" or "meanness" behind it but it is taken that way. Sometimes I say things in real life, and someone will say, "you dont have to say it like that", and realize that perhaps I had some kind of tone that made the comment more than what I meant it to be. I completely do it out of innocense without meaning anything behind it. But somehow it comes out that way. And when I realize I do it I apologize. So I will take the chance now that if I have ever on here said something in a certain way that offended someone I apologize. I am not a confrontational person at all, I hate arguing and/or fighting so I dont mean anything behind it. So Im sorry my Intercot friends if I ever ever ever said anything to offend or hurt someone. Sometimes I try to reread post before posting to see if I worded it correctly but when I reread it I reread in the "emotion" I meant to write it in so I might not look at it in a bad way. Its part of the whole writing on the net and not seeing a person face-to-face or voice-to-voice you cannot clearly get an accurate tone or facial gesture in which it might have been meant. I am sure we all do it in innocense, and if that is understood then hopefully no grudges are held and it can be overlooked and move on to the next topic or subject at hand. :thumbsup:

[Granny Jill A]

I'm totally offended by this thread! I enjoy wallowing in my own sensitivity, having very little sense of humor, and attacking people for not sharing all of my opinions exactly. I find it offensive that you think people are becoming more easily offended.

P.S. Does hockey bore you? That offends me.
P.P.S. I hope that sarcasm and tongue-in-cheek humor doesn't offend anyone! ;)
Amy

Just when I needed a laugh, there you were! Thanks for the grins. And thanks to ALL of you who have expressed an opinion on this thread. This is the type of discourse I was hoping for. On the whole, INTERCOT has a superior group of posters. That's why I like to participate.

While INTERCOT does not cover the serious topics of religion, politics, etc., the important topic of all things Disney does bring some strong emotions to the surface.

I love all of your comments on my thread.

[brownie]

The current economic troubles we're are certainly not helping. I think it's easier to escalate things online because of the anonymity.

Courtesy, treating others with dignity and respect, and "seeking first to understand" don't seem to be as important to people. They are really some simple things we can all do that would go a long way in making our world (and the internet) a much better place.

I really do enjoy Intercot because it is friendly here. I am amazed at what I see posted on other sites when I'm looking for answers to questions, especially technical, computer issues.

[Mickey91]

Usually, hot topics end up in cyber-nastiness (e.g., religion, politics, or Stitch). Intercot mods have a keen sense when a thread is going that way, and usually extinguish the flames in time. I do, however, feel bad when some Intercot newbie sincerely posts a 5th-gate rumor and gets a "yeah, right" string of sarcasm from Disnerds.

Disnerds!? Disnerds!? In this politically correct society, we prefer to be called HIGHLY KNOWLEDGEABLE DISNEY PERSONS!!:D

[teambricker04]

I agree that sometimes posters can be vicious... I try not to be and feel awful when someone is offended by what I have to say. I do think that rudeness has only gotten worse recently, in general. I don't think it is just an Intercot or online thing... it's every where. So sad, really.