How to help someone understand "the magic?"

[Stu29573]

Hello,

Let me start out by saying that, yes, I'm a Disney nut. I've been to both Disney World (multiple times) and Disneyland and I could go every year and never tire of it.

My question, though, involves my DW. We have been married for just over two years and I just can't seem to get her enthused about going. She thinks it's too expensive, that she won't like the rides, that it's just for kids, that she's sick of hearing about it, etc....

Now, she tries to act interested, but I think she thinks it will be like Six Flags (we like close to SFOTx) and consequently we've postponed our trip for the past two years...

I always get the planning videos, and she's a little interested when she watches, but that about it. Does anyone have any other suggestions?

P.S. I'm not sure if this is the right section, but I AM talking about the parks :mickey:

[CleveRocks]

Some advice ....

DON'T try to get her interested.

DON'T look for that same sparkle in her eyes that everyone sees in your eyes when you talk about Disney.

DON'T expect her to be as excited as you.

DO ask her to keep an open mind and just try it once.

These are key things. Just ask her to try, and let her form her own opinion.

There are some people who are head-over-heels into Civil War reenactments. They camp out all weekend, dress like soldiers from 150 years ago, pretend to shoot each other and die, etc. For the life of me, I don't get it. If my wife were really into it, I'd be yawning in between episodes of rolling my eyes and complaining. I'm sure all the people who LIVE to do all that stuff go on their own message boards and complain that people like me just don't get it. Correct. I don't get it. I probably never will. And if it were my wife, the more she kept pushing me to ADORE the idea of pretending to be a 16-year old corporal from Kentucky with a head wound, the more I'd probably rebel against it.

So just get her to agree to go with you once. Don't expect her to be excited. Don't look into her eyes and expect to see the excitement and then complain when you don't see it ... it'll just make her feel badly and won't help your cause at all.

[mom2morgan]

Yes, I agree that the key is just to get her to try it once...I'm fairly confident she'll find it to be a pleasant surprise! BUT...maybe you can also plan some of her favourite things to do. Would she enjoy La Nouba? Does she like eating at nice restaurants? Would she enjoy a day at a spa...or maybe driving the race-cars at whatsit-called (obviously NOT one of MY interests, LOL). If you can throw in a few things "just for her" that aren't typically "theme park-y" things, it might make her feel pampered AND open up her eyes to all that Disney has to offer!

[kid@heartforever]

Just bring her and the "Magic" will do the rest! Really the bottom line is some people get it and some don't. You are either a Disney Freak or you are not. But if she has never been she can't understand why you feel the way you do. Hopefully you can get her to go and some pixie dust will fall on her!!! Good Luck!:mickey:

[Stu29573]

Yeah, my plan has been that once I get her there, she'll probably get it....I hope. Anyway, it's the getting her there that's proving difficult!
By the way, I try not to push her, or go on and on about it. I just drop it if she seems uninterested, and go on to the next topic.
I'm aiming for next summer now....we'll see how it goes!:mickey:

[elmjimmlm]

My DH was a little leary of it to begin with too...Now we are going on our 4th trip together and he talks about it as much as I do...(but he still says that I'm obsessed...:secret:

[Seasonscraps]

Maybe try to sell her on the resorts, dining, spa services maybe La Nouba? Just to get her foot in the door. It's not for everyone, but I think she should at least be willing to try it out once for you to really see how she feels about it.

Good luck!

[tmosier]

... She thinks it's too expensive, that she won't like the rides, that it's just for kids, that she's sick of hearing about it, etc....


1.) Since she thinks it's too expensive (and you must thank your wife right now for being concerned about the family's finances!), have you looked into staying at a value resort during value season?

2.) Is your wife computer-savvy? Does she like to do research and plan? If so, maybe she'd be interested in checking out intercot.com. You could e-mail her links to certain Disney fan sites (intercot, mousesavers.com, mouseplanet.com, allearsnet.com, and disney.com). Maybe not all at once though! E-mailing the links is a little less in-your-face and she might appreciate the toned down approach.

3.) Last resort---- tell her, "I wear the pants in the family and I say we're going. Now get packed!" If you say this to her, be sure to duck!

4.) If she says she's tired of hearing about it, hard as it will be, you need to be quiet for awhile. :(

[#1donaldfan]

Just get her to Disney and hopefully she'll see what it's all about......I've been and addict for years n years and I think I've got the family "on board" too !!! :mickey:

[buzznwoodysmom]

If she's never been, that would be the missing link. Seriously every single person I've ever helped plan their first trip to WDW just didn't get why this place was supposed to be better than any other theme park. As much as I tried to explain to them, show pictures or videos nothing seemed to get it to sink in that this is not your typical theme park. Every single one of them came back totally getting it. I've heard over and over again "WDW is not at all what we expected it to be". You just need to plan a trip and get her over there, then chances are she'd understand what you've been talking about all along. Why don't you each pick a destination and one year go to hers, the next year go to yours that way she'll really have no say in where you go for your pick. Good luck!

[RBrooksC]

I have said this before is there are many people who can't let go of being an adult, even for just a few days. I am not sure why but they are unable to let themselves go and just be a kid again.

My wife and I have been there several times without kids including our honeymoon. The first thing we always do is go to Fantasy Land and ride the dark rides. We even went to CRT and had breakfast with the Princesses because no honeymoon is complete unless you get hugs from pretty girls in the early 20s dressed as Disney Princesses.

The Magic to me is the total theming of the area. The theming engulfs you and surrounds you. You get a feeling in each place you go. Even in a sterile resorts like the CR gives you a sense of awe when you enter it.

It is something one has to experience and if a person isn't even receptive to letting go of their stoic adult self, it will be hard to embrace that experience and learn to love WDW.

I hope your wife is enraptured by her experience and you both can enjoy it together the way my wife and I do. Oh yeah and our son, I guess I can't forget our son. LOL

[Simba'sBud]

I was a skeptic myself for a while and never understood why my DW was SOOO into it. I had only been once in 1991 for a band trip in 8th grade and we only had a couple of days there. 2 years ago, we finally did an anniversary trip where she had everything planned out and we stayed on Disney property with the DDP. It was then that I realized more of the 'experience' behind it and not just a place to ride rides and see things. Needless to say, we have less than 3 months for our third visit in just 2 years and I am every bit excited as she is.

One suggestion would be the Disney specials they do on Travel Channel. They have some updated ones they just started showing, including Samantha Brown's Disney Favorites, which she shows a lot of different things inside and out of the parks that most people such as your DW may not realize.

Another thing is that if she enjoys food as much as my DW and I do, bring her to intercot and explore some of the menus with her and see if she would at least like to help you choose a couple of meals together.

Like you said, once you get her there, she will most likely begin to see the light!

[laward32]

I am kind of in the same boat with my DH. He has been twice and doesn't care to ever step foot on the property ever again. Myself and my two DD (6&8) love it and could go several times a year if we could. He gets tired of me talking about Disney, so I just don't talk about it around him. I talk to my mom, dad and sister and BIL, because we are ALL Disney nuts. I can't make him like it, so we will just do trips without him from now on. I bargain with him and tell him he can to Vegas or somewhere with his friends for a long weekend.:mickey:

[garymacd]

There are two kinds of people in the world: those that get the Disney Magic, and those that think it's a cult!

Those that think it is a cult, well, most of them have never been there or are just jealous of those that have.

For those, we just have to pat them on the knee and say, "Tut, tut, dear. It will be alright when we get back from the farm - er! - park!":D

[Itchy]

I am the disney nut in the family as I have been to DW once a year since 2004 except for this year and its twice. My kids ( the youngest is 23 ) enjoy DW as well. My ex thinks I am nuts but I just tell her it is my way of relaxing from the humdum of the work place.

I think that if you get her there and let her enjoy some of the things that are girly the rest will fall into place. As

As for cost where else can you go for a little over a $1000 at a value and get a weeks vacation with all of the fun.

Oh! dont mention the disney bugs that bite:bug::bug::bug::bug::bug::bug:
only we can see. Thats how we get addicted.

Good luck, If you get her there I think that she will be hooked for life.:mickey:

[DisneyFan1979]

Although she's concerned about price, I would actually suggest staying away from the value resorts - they are very in your face Disney all the time with their dramatic theming and family atmosphere. I would suggest one of the more subtle resorts like the Animal Kingdom Lodge or Wilderness Lodge. Or even a non-Disney resort entirely like the Swan or Dolphin. I would, however, definitely recommend staying on property though (it adds a little something extra and makes the trip more relaxing).

[Finiamh]

My DW has sort of the same issue. We are going in Dec '09 for her first time and she says it's still so far away that it just seems like just an idea. She says she will start getting more into it once we start booking things like the room and airfare and it becomes more real. I get the feeling she also thinks it is just like any old Six Flags or amusement area with a couple extra perks.

So right now I have to balance the excitement with not getting on her nerves.

[BMan62]

First off, like CleveRocks said, don't try to get her enthused before the trip.

Next, don't take her, for her first time, during one of the busy times - go during a value season, where the crowds are smaller.

Third, actually first in my book, do NOT take her kicking and screaming. Make sure that she is willing to go.

The "Magic" will take care of the rest.

[LizLovesDiz]

Isn't it funny how some people get the Disney bug,and some people don't.
My DH was never into going until last year when he finally did.Now I overhear him telling friends how disney is the way to go,because there is something for everyone !!! :mickey:

[dismommy]

OK, I am the Disney nut in our family and my husband could have cared less. My sister was in the same boat (she may be along later to post her own response so if so forgive me for speaking for her) and in both our case out husbands just need to experience the magic through our eyes and especially through our children's eyes and they became converts. Now I am not saying that this will work for all, some people don't care for the noise, the crowds , the expense etc, but in my house we will skip alot of meals out and other "extras" to pay for that next trip to Disney.:mickey3::minnie:

[WhiteRose1]

my Hubby did a Disney Honeymoon for me. I planned the whole thing, he put down the dough. I know him very well (technogeek, loves dolphins, likes to see stuff behind the scenes, loves good service, enjoys high end food.) and I planned 'me' days and 'he' days and 'we' days. For him, we did Diving with Dolphins, V&A, LaNouba, DQ, behind the scenes tours, even got him a pal mickey! heh.) We even stayed at a resort I thought he would enjoy - AK.

I showed him the plans before we left, and showed him what we would be doing. He was reluctant, but expected to have a good time.

Before we left WDW, *HE* was planning the next trip....he totally Got it. He totally understood the draw, and the ability to just let go and have fun, to let the stress of real life fall away, and see things with an open mind and a child-like heart. If I tried to tell him this before we left, he would not have had those experiences.

[Sam&Alex&Josh'sMOM]

I also think that if cost is truly a factor, show her the $$ you can save with a value resort... Abd show her pics on line... then show her the prices of the moderates and those pictures. Let her choose. Yes, Values are Big and brassy and Everything Disney,.,but you can save a LOT of $$ and if saving $$ is what speaks to hre... so be it!

I suggest taking her during a season that is known for having less crowds! If you do get her there, you don't want her first experience to be a 90 minute wait for POTC!

FInally if you just need to get her to agree... first agree to do something for her that you are pretty sure you will hate/ dislike/ or just not choose on your own to do. Poetry readings, macreme, couples dance class, cooking dinner for her parents... something that will let her know you are willing to try things her way... if maybe she will take a chance and try things your way for a trip to Disney!