Any advice?

[Cinderelley]

My family seems to be having a hard time adjusting to me going back to school. Every time I sit down to do my homework, they come and talk to me. I could be ignored for hours on end while I do housework, play video games, etc. BUT as soon as I sit down to work on my homework, I'm bombarded every 5 minutes. DH is the worst. He went to Sprouts today as I was sitting down to write a paper. He comes back 20 minutes later, walks in the door, and proceeds to talk to me about the strawberries he bought, how much the cost, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. :mad: Then he stops and asks me if I like strawberries. My answer was "I'm working on my homework. I don't care about the strawberries." Yes, it was a bit harsh, but I've nicely told him for 10 weeks now that I need to be able to concentrate when I'm working on my school work.
The kids are almost as bad, and on the rare occasions when I'm the only one home, the dogs decide that they need a little attention. One even raked my chest with her paws hard enough to give me welts.
Has anyone found any ways to overcome this?

[merlinmagic4]

Do you have a library close by where you could go? That is exactly the reason I have been putting off getting my master's degree (besides the cost). I can't imagine having any time to get anything done! I'll be interested to see what you figure out! Good luck :thumbsup:

[Goofeygal]

That is what happened to me, so I started going to school early and doing my homework in the school library.

[RenDuran]

I have the same problem when I get on the phone! I will think the coast is clear for a little private time and then suddenly there they all are! Screaming, hollering, asking me for a drink, etc! I can't imagine trying to study through all that!

The dogs would probably be easier to train....I just give mine a nice piece of rawhide when I need quiet! I think the other posters have a good idea about going to the library. Or maybe you could change your study times to first thing in the morning or very late in the evening when no one else is up.

Good luck!

[CAS]

Posters have it right; either do your homework when you know they're not up yet or have already gone to sleep. The other option is good, too; stop by the library on your way home from school for your quiet time and you won't have to make 2 trips. :thumbsup:

[SBETigg]

I've been working from home for over ten years now and I still haven't trained my crew to leave me alone when I'm working. I've learned to work with distractions and constant interruption because it was easier to train me to live with it than to train the rest of them to leave me in peace. Sad but true.

When it's really crunch time with my deadlines, I tend to work off hours more, like getting up hours before or staying up hours after everyone-- but that's a bad solution because I never catch up on that lost sleep. Going somewhere else to do my work is a big hassle and I'm not as productive out of my environment, so it's a catch-22. Best wishes with finding something that works for you!

[WDWFanatic]

Maybe you could give them a warning. "I will be doing my homework in 1/2 hour. If you need me come see me NOW. And then put up a sign "Please do not disturb for 45 minutes" and then stick to it!

I think all families are the same, lol. My kids and DH will do the same thing, but I'm guilty too... As soon as DH hops in the shower I'm knocking on the door asking him a question:D.

Good Luck, I'm sure you can train them.

[ibelieveindisneymagic]

It is hard to fit in studying time, isn't it?

I completed my degree last year, and I was pretty lucky and the family was pretty good about it, but I understand 100% how you're feeling.

I would set up a "work area", hopefully you have a room that you can use, but if not, a part of the dining room/kitchen table can work as well. When you're there, doing work it is like you're not home. I love the idea of putting up a "do not disturb" sign.

You will have to be firm, and not feel guilty about firmly reminding them that you're not available right now.

[princessjojo]

Girlfriend, it is hard. Let me tell you. I just finished nursing school this way and thought I was going to have to move to get it done. But I found time during the day to study. I would sit in my car at younger DS school for an hour and read (his school is 2min from mine and it was senseless for me to drive home and stay for 15 min only to drive back to pick him up). This was another time when I would threaten them with housework if they didn't leave me alone. I would stay up until 12 or 1am to study because trying to get anything done before they went to bed was pointless.

The best advice I can offer is what has been said previously. Try to get to the library early or after classes. It's quiet and highly conducive to studying. I'm still going through it as I have tried every day for the last 3 weeks to study for my boards. No one in my house has yet to learn how to make their own sandwich yet!

Best of luck! It's hard, but you've crossed the biggest hurdle. You decided to start. You can do this.

[MsMin]

Families don't like change and it's not uncommon for them to "sabotage" the change that goes on in the house. They (meaning any one of them big or small) may be convinced that they are losing you in some respect and feel threatened by the change. Talking to you interrupting you helps soothe that fear (they are often unaware they are doing it) that you will not be there for them. Kind of hard to explain in a post but yes, it's very common as you can see by the # of posts.
It's nice to get out and study sometimes but isn't always feasible. I can remember being up til 5 am on some projects and we just don't have libraries open that late. I also used to study w/ people. Even if you have friends over to study or work on a project it helps reduce the interruptions. I like the sign idea. I used to tell mine they couldn't disturb me unless someone was bleeding.
Let them know you are not forgetting them. Tell the children about plans for a break.. like when I take a break we can do lunch, have simple things they can prepare themselves. My kids had plenty of pizza when I wrote my thesis.
Make some fun time for them and your husband. Even if it's a break at the coffee shop, a change in family behavior that includes them can help them look forward to the change and not just rob them of "mom".
:pixie: for your stresses. I think that having a husband and family is like having an extra course so plan accordingly when you schedule your semester. :thumbsup:

[drummerboy]

As each one approaches you with a question, etc., you can suddenly think of a chore you need them to do. After a while, they'll be afraid to approach you during study time.

[Disneyatic]

I have this same problem with DH and DD8! Last night I was on the computer trying to complete an assignment and DH came in and turned on the PS3 and started playing a game!!!

I usually just tell them "I have to do homework, I need 1 hour (or however long you need) alone" and then I go into the computer room and close the door. If someone comes in, before they even start talking I ask them if it's important or an emergency and if not, wait!

It is tough to concentrate with so many other things pulling on you!
Good luck!

[Tinkerfreak]

I am thinking about going back to school but have not decided what I want to go for yet. DH says "honey you are almost 40 you should know what you want to be when you grow up":D
I have been a SAHM for about 7 or 8 years and we have a small construction company. I have two DD's age 10 and 13. I know I should take advantage of being home but I think to myself between helping run our business, taking care of 2 kids and my Dad having a stroke so I have to help my mom all the time I wonder when I will have time to do it. I would love to be a Disney Travel Agent but don't know how I even get started on that. I also love to write and could see myself writing books.
I think the idea of going to the library is great. Also giving them a chore every time they bug you should really work wonders.

[Kairi_7378]

My husband had (HAS!) a hard time with me being back in school. I waited 5 years after my BS's to go back for my MS. He is STILL driving me crazy whenever I start my homework. For example, last week, I had a take home final to work on. He chose the night that I was working on the final to do some plumbing in the bathroom. Not only did he shut off all of the water and make a lot of noise and mess, but then afterwards, he had to come and brag about how brilliant that he was that he un plugged the tub. After a few minutes, he said "You don't seem to be that excited about this!" It was all that I could do to say that I didn't give a darn about anything but Advanced Soil Mechanics at that particular time.

One thing that has helped was to go to the library/computer lab to do homework. Another was to set a weekly schedule of my chores, what he wanted me to do, and what I needed to do for school. That way, he doesn't complain that I spring homework on him when he wants me to clean the house (yes, this has been an argument before.) Another suggestion that I got from a book was to make a chart of how many times you've been interrupted... and giving a prize to the person that causes the least interruptions in a week. I also do my more important work at night (after he goes to bed or before he gets off.) We are still having trouble with the boundaries between my being a student and my being a wife but we're getting there. Good luck!

PS. I like Drummerboy's suggestion too!

[Cinderelley]

Thanks for all the responses everyone. I work nights, so I used to stay up and do my homework. Now that everyone's out of school, they're up too. My classes are held at the hospital, so I don't have a school library to go to. I ordered a laptop. I think I'll be heading to my mother's house to work on homework. (Maybe I'll bring my laundry home to her too.)

MsMin thanks for the psychology behind it. It makes it easier to deal with if I know the whys behind it.

Drummeryboy, I especially like your idea. That way all those household chores that creep into my mind while I'm working on homework can be taken care of too. ;)

[RenDuran]

As each one approaches you with a question, etc., you can suddenly think of a chore you need them to do. After a while, they'll be afraid to approach you during study time.

How come none of us girls thought of this? We've all been running our households wrong!

[SBETigg]

How come none of us girls thought of this? We've all been running our households wrong!

I've tried it, but it often ended up in further distraction and work for me. It's a cute and clever solution that works in concept better than in reality. At least, in my house. If handing out chores at random works in your house without resulting in meltdown, questions, and chaos, more power to you.

[RenDuran]

I've tried it, but it often ended up in further distraction and work for me. It's a cute and clever solution that works in concept better than in reality. At least, in my house. If handing out chores at random works in your house without resulting in meltdown, questions, and chaos, more power to you.

Yeah...it does sound good in theory. Usually my commands are met with blank stares!