trips w/o the kids?

[septembergirl]

On our recent family vacation to WDW, DH and I got to spend three glorious hours alone at MK while my teenage son stay with the kids at the resort. I would love to go back sometime for a long weekend with DH but I know the guilt would do me in. I wonder how many of you have gone sans children and how you manage...

[Sunshine1010]

Ironically, I just booked a trip for my husband and I for December. We haven't been without our son in FIVE years.

Leaving Sunday, coming back on a Wednesday. BUT - we're leaving LATE Sunday and coming back EARLY Wednesday. So....we'll literally only have 48 hours to spend together.

I'm not sure if I made the right decision. Part of me says yes, the other says no.

Yeah, the guilt has already set in. I can't even talk to my husband about it because it's a secret. He won't know until the day of.....

The hardest thing will be NOT being with my son and the possibility that something would happen. Something can mean anything.

He'll be in good hands, but I'm SO worried about HIS stress level from us being gone.

I'm not going to tell him where we are going....I'm going to tell him that we have a long medical class to go to.

I'm like you.....can anyone help me through this?

[tinkerbelle75]

I went sans kids and hubby twice last year for the F&WF and the F&GF and had a ball. My aunt went with me and it was very relaxing. I allowed myself to not feel guilty because I had a September trip booked for 10 days with the whole family. Everybody needs some "Mommy time" away! My advice is to just have fun and don't worry!:mickey:

[dolphinmickey9170]

We took a 5 night trip in August without kids. It was the most fabulous time, as we were able to converse without interuption, we could do what we wanted without worrying to upset anyone (meaning my hormonal teen DDs). You and your hubby need a break every now and then....this is a good way to remember why you became parents in the first place. Go, enjoy yourselves, don't have second thoughts. Your kids will be safe, and they are only a phone call away. You can still call them at night and say your good nights and I love yous!!

[missbunny]

My sons are older than yours (21 & 19) but first took a short Disney trip without them in 2003. It was so wonderful to have some time to ourselves. :cloud9: My sons are great but sometimes you need to be a wife and a mom. You have to recharge your batteries.
We asked our sons to join us on our last two trips and they said no. Boy what is wrong with them. :confused:
Next year we are planning a family gathering and they are joining us. They will have their own room and since the are old enough they will be on their own.
Don't feel guilty about being on any kind of trip without your kids. It will be good for everyone involved to spend time apart. My sons always enjoyed their time spent with grandma and grandpa.
Have a great time and let us know about your wonderful time together.

[IloveDisney71]

My DH and I took a trip w/out our kids when they were 14 1/2 & 16. We didn't feel guilty at all. The kids have been so many times that it didn't bother them. We had a great time with just the 2 of us. We were able to take our time and do what we wanted to do. I think it is perfectly fine to take a trip for yourselves - parents need some alone time now and then. :mickey:

[teambricker04]

I have been with out kids BEFORE I had them. They are very little right now, so I can't imagine not taking them, but I can see myself doing it in the future.

I say go for it and have a great time!!! Every parent deserves a break and if you can do it... HOORAY!

Isn't feeling guilty part of a mom's lot in life??? I know in my family, it's genetic :)

[mouseketeer mom]

I'm on board with you September girl. My DH and I are discussing our first ever trip without the kids. I'm excited about it, but it feels, well, kind of unnatural! We are planning for presidents day weekend, leaving on a Friday, home on a Monday. We haven't been without the kids for 13 years now. My 13 year old is sooo upset and can't believe we can "do this to her" kind of stuff, my 11 yo and my 7yo are supportive and are excited to stay with my sister. It will feel weird. Especially knowing that WDW is our place, OUR FAMILY place, so to be there without the kids will be very strange. We figured we will stay at an Epcot resort, and maybe do a tour together, and well, just be together. I hope we can enjoy it! My DH keeps saying "Are you sure we can do this?" because he too, feels the guilt. I do tho, deep inside, feel ready for it. The kids are older now, and my sister is terrific with them and loves them to pieces. Soo...I haven't planned it yet., but I think about it everyday!

[Tinkerfreak]

DH and I did this at the end of April for the first time and while we enjoyed doing some things that the kids never really want to do we really did miss them. We kept finding ourselves saying wow DD1 would have loved this or DD2 would have loved to have seen that. It was not just about the guilt but about them not being there to experience some of the things we did. Having said all that though I think I would consider another trip without them because they have been so many times that it just does not seem to excite them as much as it used to. It is also getting harder to take them out of school and we just won't go during vacations and summer when it is hot and crowded. DH and I found it too crowded when we went alone this past time. I think our next solo trip will be at our usual time in the fall. The kids didn't mind our ging without them until they found out that we had seen Corbin Blue and Zack Efron. They were upset that they had missed that.

[divinedi]

My situation is a little different, I went with my now exBF in 2003 and we left mine and his kids at home (not together!) they were all teenagers already by that point. We definitely needed some time away together and I really wanted to go to Disneyworld, even though the kids hadn't been since 1997 and I knew they would have like to go again. His kids were with their Mom and mine had their Dad for most of the time, they spent a couple of nights on their own, but were plenty old enough. My kids were pretty supportive and looking forward to a few nights on their own!!

Well, drive down went fine, took us two days to get there, arrived, got to the room, and that's when the guilt set in. Looking around the room, and knowing that the kids weren't going to be there to experience this with us, I felt very overwhelmed, unpacked very quietly with him asking me every few minutes what's wrong? Told him I couldn't talk about it yet, or I would start crying and not stop! Went for a walk, calmed down, we talked and called the kids to let them know we were there safe and sound.

The next day we started on our tour of Disneyworld (he had never been there), and from that moment on, I was in heaven. This was the trip that made me fall in love with Disney, and despite a few moments of remorse during the trip, we had a terrific time!!! We did what we wanted, ate when we wanted, slept how long etc. etc. Several times during the trip, when we would see parents and kids going at it, tired, whiny children, angry and tired parents we would look at each other and just smile :blush: We definitely did miss the kids, and we came back with my 3 girls about 8 months later (his kids couldn't or wouldn't come, different story!).

Moral of the story - you are going to feel guilty and miss them, but it's MOST definitely worth it, just try to live in the moment, know they will be coming another time, that they are fine where they are, and YOU definitely deserve and need some time alone, and if this is where you love to be then go for it :mickey:

[pugslave]

My DH and I went on a solo trip when our DD was 4. While I do admit there were some guilty feelings, it was very nice to spend some time with my DH and just relax! Like PP's mentioned, we slept in, had late dinners, explored othewise unexplored things, stayed up late, had cocktails, had a couple's massage, etc!! My parents came to our home and stayed with DD, so that she was in her comfort area. She had a great time with my parents, and honestly it was nice to see her at the airport when we came home and she gave us big hugs and kisses!! We went from Thurs morning to Sunday afternoon. I would definitely recommend this "break from reality". Enjoy!

[Marilyn Michetti]

Oh, I love it now that the kids are grown, and me'ngrampa just go alone. This year, we're going for four days to Disneyland. We only live six hours away, in Phoenix, but we've always gone to Orlando.

There are times I wish we could share the experience with children, but it's pretty neat when it's just the two of us.:dance:

[TikiGoddess]

On one of our family trips my DH let me go off by myself for about 30 min while our DD took a nap in the stroller. Big mistake. That little taste of what it might be like to do Disney all by myself was just enough to get me thinking about a solo trip.

Fast forward 8 months later -- my kids are then 2 yrs old and 4 mos. Hubby has agreed to let me go down for a long weekend (late late Fri until Monday afternoon). It was an AWESOME trip. I will always remember it!! But leaving the house was terrifying. I hadn't thought about how I might feel, leaving my kids for a couple of days. My mother-in-law drove me to the airport and I was a mess. She was great-- I was telling her that it felt like I was physically tied to them and the bonds were stretching the further we got from the house. She said, "think of it as a rubber band, it will bring you back to them." I was thinking of the kids and worrying all through Saturday (although I did manage to have a good time!). Staying in the moment and knowing that this was precious time (as a young mother a whole weekend to myself was priceless, let alone at Disney) helped me to relax and enjoy it.

Now I've got another solo trip coming up in less than two weeks. :) I have been thinking about how it will feel to be away from the kids -- the worst is the feeling that if something happens, you're THAT FAR away from them and can't do anything -- and trying to prepare myself for that inevitable feeling of separation. I know the kids will be in good hands (DH!). I know my DH has given me his blessing for this trip. I know the kids would probably not enjoy parts of this trip, as I will be doing many Intercot meets. If I brought the kids, it would be a totally different trip. I would have to go with their preferences, limitations (no RnRC for me), and sleep patterns. Besides, we were just at WDW this July and will most likely go back with them either next year or in 2009.

Yeah, the guilt and anxiety will be there. I think you just have to be prepared for it and realize that you can treat yourself as a person --rather than a parent -- and that being happy will make you a better parent. "If momma ain't happy..."

Best of luck.
TikiG

[irish1967]

DH and I went to WDW for 5 days for our 10 year anniversary. It was an absolute BLAST - and we enjoyed every minute of it.

My children are used to us packing up and going away for long weekends - we do it once a year. But, I have to say that they were pretty shocked that we actually went to WDW without them. As we talked about the trip and the different things we had done, I think they realized that they had a better time at home with Grandpa!

I'll be going to WDW is January with a friend for the half marathon and I am looking forward to that as well! It'll be the first time that I am there w/out my family ever. It will be a different experience, but I am definitely looking forward to it!

[ThanxForNoticin]

My advice would be very simple - if you are thinking about it, then do it - but with the following recommendations. 1) Keep the first trip without the kids short - maybe 2-3 nights. See how that goes; 2) Make sure you tell your kids what you are doing. Don't try to sneak away without them!!; and 3) Plan to call home no more than once a day to see how things are going - set a time and stick to it. Don't call in the morning and then the afternoon and then before bed. If you are getting away to spend quality time with your spouse, then take advantage of the opportunity. From experience, it can be a great time for just the two of you - and it certainly does not make you a 'bad parent'!

The cool thing about Disney is that you can absolutely love your experience there WITH kids, but also without. If you do this trip without the kids, it will be that much more fun to plan a future trip with them.

Just our opinion and something to think about. Enjoy your trip!

[LoriMistress]

DH and I don't have kids but we go to the Disney parks every two years or so. For December, we'll be at Disney for 11 days/11 nights. I would suggest maybe for the first trip to make it at least 3-5 days/nights. Make ADRs at the romantic restaurants on property. I would also make an ADR for either a horse carriage ride for the evening; after dinner. Maybe see Cirque du Soleil on your arrival.

[cal5755]

Hey I just booked a trip and am leaving kids AND dh home lol!! I feel a tad guilty.. but it is my birthday present from mom and we are going for the soap star weekend so its girls weekend away!! YEAY can't wait.

I will tell you what I am telling myself. I deserve this because I am a wonderful mother and a fulltime waitress!! I am also a loving wife and often go on 5 or less hours of sleep a night. The more I repeat why I deserve it.. the less guilty I feel. Plus it helps that the kids could care less. DD 4 wants me to bring her back a Mickey Mouse and DD 8 wants goofy taffy or a lollipop and DS 12 wants a Mickey Head cookie and a few pressed coins. They picked their sitter and are content.. DH.. well that is another story lol.. but he will get over it eventually hee hee.

Yes I am spoiled... and boy to I loooooove it!!