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DVC2004
03-26-2007, 02:31 PM
Well I knew this was going to happen eventually having two boys. They were hanging out at the neighborhood playground yesterday with a friend. My youngest (8) came home very upset. He said two boys he didn't know (one bigger and one abot his size) came up to him while he was sitting on the slide, pushed him (he scraped his elbow)then took his shoe off and played keep away with it. My oldest (who's special needs) and the friend stood by. Anyway when my little one got the shoe back the two kids approached him again at which time he kicked them. Once he says. According to him, the one who was kicked started crying and they both left. I have mixed feelings about this- on one hand I don't want my kids to be physically fighting with anyone, but on the other hand it certainly seemed warranted. At least by his story and my oldest one told the same story. I told him I didn't like fighting but it was OK to defend in the case that someone was physically hurting him and would not stop.
Has this happened with your kids?

Mickey'sGirl
03-26-2007, 02:52 PM
I do not like fighting either -- but this sounds like a good example of your son defending himself. These kids had already demonstrated that they would get physical with him -- and when they approached him again, there was nothing to make your son feel that they would not get physical with him again. I'll bet they will leave him alone now.

Marker
03-26-2007, 02:55 PM
I'm sure others will disagree, but for me Kudos to your son for refusing to be a victim to a bully. No, starting a fight is not acceptable, but in my book, allowing yourself to be a victim is just as unacceptable.

SandmanGStefani24
03-26-2007, 02:57 PM
not to my kids, but to me. I was smaller than the other kids and a year younger too. I got picked on quite a bit until the one day I fought back on the playground. It took one punch and the kid couldn't see out of that eye for a week. Thankfully I didn't have to fight very much after that. I then did my fighting in the ring, at the local gym so that if I ever had to fight again, I would be ready. Ignoring, being more mature, and telling adults can't save you all the time, and sometimes a quick haymaker is all punks understand. Fighting isn't something I recommend, but it at times is your only option. Better to be prepared for it, I say. As long as you teach your children when it's right and when it's wrong they will be wise enough to know the difference. Hope this helps!

magicofdisney
03-26-2007, 03:11 PM
I totally agree that kids need to learn to stick up for themselves and not allow themselves to become victims. I think you son did the right thing by kicking back. I tell my boys all the time they need to defend themselves at all costs. That may not be a popular sentiment, but it's what I believe in.

SandmanGStefani24
03-26-2007, 03:15 PM
I'm sure others will disagree, but for me Kudos to your son for refusing to be a victim to a bully. No, starting a fight is not acceptable, but in my book, allowing yourself to be a victim is just as unacceptable.

AMEN TO THAT!!! :number1:

merlinmagic4
03-26-2007, 03:55 PM
AMEN TO THAT!!! :number1:

I have to agree. It sounds like he did what he had to do and they will be much less likely to bother him again. I would never condone my child starting a fight but to defend oneself is sometimes necessary (unfortunately).

PeachyGal
03-26-2007, 05:08 PM
Your son had no choice. If he hadn't stood up to them, who knows what the progression could have been.

DS(8) is in karate. He will be a black belt by the time he is 10, but currently is in a good position to defend himself as needed. We have had many discussions with him on "don't throw the first punch." It also helps that his karate instructor is very very good. He continually reminds the kids not to start the fight, but that it is certainly acceptable and expected that they defend theirselves.

Unfortunately, it is a way of life these days. I feel much better knowing that in the event someone tries to pick on him, he will be in a position to defend himself.

PirateLover
03-26-2007, 05:36 PM
I am gonna go along with everyone else so far and say your son was perfectly justified. No one should ever instigate a fight or go looking for one, but when incidents like this occur, you have to show bullies that you aren't afraid of them and you'll stick up for yourself, and most times this means following through on a physical threat. It is the way life has been for many years. The strong will always try to pick on the weak. If they find a weakness, they will exploit it for all it is worth.

kakn7294
03-26-2007, 08:33 PM
I also think your son was justified in his reaction to the bullying. He didn't start the fight but he showed that he also wasn't going to sit back and take it either. By what he did, he defended himself and possibly even will prevent these two from bullying someone else since they now know not everyone smaller than them will put up with it. I don't agree with fighting to solve your problems either, but one kick doesn't really amount to much of a fight. He's quite a brave boy and you should be proud of him for standing up for himself.

Bethis26fan
03-26-2007, 09:03 PM
I'm sure others will disagree, but for me Kudos to your son for refusing to be a victim to a bully. No, starting a fight is not acceptable, but in my book, allowing yourself to be a victim is just as unacceptable.

I agree starting it wouldn't be good but standing up for yourself is good. I grew up with all boys and they picked on me and i would tell my dad he told me to fight back and they would leave me alone. (my mom wasn't happy with that) One day I did they were picking on me and I fought back and from then on they didn't bother me.